All the cool kids use the phrases on the left
(media.scored.co)
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"Violent Language"
Fucking snowflakes
Change it to "That's a good idea!"
Yep, you're not allowed to disagree with a leftist snowflake, even when their ideas are shit (so most of the time).
Idioms and metaphors are doubleplus ungood. Use of idioms encourages imagination and abstract thinking and must be discouraged among the underclass.
"Instead of saying something interesting, use these stock phrases to show your friends you have the personality of a goldfish"
'I Bombed the presentation' ' I was blown away by her presentation'
Ok these two might be a problem if you hear 'Allah akbar' first...
Might be a real problem in Britbongistan.
LoL!
Also a point to note: "That's not a bad idea" is essentially how British English expresses "that's a good idea".
I'd stay "stop colonising the language" but the only people this bunch want to annoy more than Americans is Brits...
Don't forget this one:
Instead of "child sexual mutilation"
Say this: "gender affirming care"
Get used to that one, lefties.
Plot twist: They did do their best. They just suck.
Autistic idiot doesn't understand the point of colorful language. And probably would think the term "colorful language" is racist.
I’m gonna make my idioms even more violent now to compensate.
Jump the gun has to do with starting pistols, there isn't even in violence involved.
Inching ever closer to Demolition Man again.
My favorite part of these styles of lists is picking apart all the ways it doesn't make sense, or meaning was lost.
These do not mean the same thing. "Taking a stab" usually implies it's your first time, but someone else could have already tried. It doesn't have to be "first pass."
Similar to "bite the bullet" and "won't avoid it any longer." You don't have to avoid something before biting the bullet.
The meaning doesn't carry through as well but, more importantly, this is just about the gayest shit ever.
More meaning lost, these are not synonymous.
Sounds like it would have to be delivered sarcastically. Possibly by a Whedon character.
And there's so much more. At least half these lose significant meaning, or just sound lame.
Yeah, I caught that the rephrasing of "take a stab at it" was also wrong. But I don't expect much from someone who was willing to think this up and put it into writing.
It's interesting. A bunch of these aren't even about inflicting violence, but how to safely take it. They don't just want to kill your offense but your defence as well.
Trick question, there isn't one, because you murdered the child.
This is a pretty old post, I remember seeing this list, or perhaps one just like it, many years ago.
Where exactly is the dividing line between evolution and censorship?
For the third last one, I'm thinking "She really lewinski'd that presentation" could be a better alternative.
"you talk like a fag and your shit's all retarded"
That would be my exact response if this was posted to Twitter