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66
[The Babylon Bee] CDC Declares Gay Orgies An 'Essential Activity' (babylonbee.com)
posted 3 years ago by Galean 3 years ago by Galean +66 / -0
21 comments share
21 comments share save hide report block hide replies
Comments (21)
sorted by:
▲ 30 ▼
– FuckGenderPolitics 30 points 3 years ago +30 / -0

We need to place bets on when this ends up in Not the Bee. They already declared rioting essential.

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▲ 25 ▼
– cccpneveragain 25 points 3 years ago +25 / -0

It's close that's for sure. The CDC even has guides for what to do if you have Monkeypox and decide to have sex anyway. It's impossible to ask fags to keep it in their pants for just a couple weeks.

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▲ 18 ▼
– FuckGenderPolitics 18 points 3 years ago +18 / -0

It's impossible to ask fags to keep it in their pants for just a couple weeks.

It's not impossible to ask. It's impossible to get them to actually do it voluntarily. After all this Kung Flu bullshit I see no reason not to subject the fags to the totalitarian measures the rest of society was forced to undergo. It would actually work in this case because schlong covid doesn't spread like the common cold.

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▲ 1 ▼
– coke501 1 point 3 years ago +1 / -0

Sadly they'll just subject all of society again. No way they'll admit who the primary vector of the spread is.

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▲ 7 ▼
– WhitePhoenix 7 points 3 years ago +7 / -0

I mean, it's not just a gay problem - if we could do the same for blacks we wouldn't have a high abortoin + fatherlessness rate for them too.

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▲ 16 ▼
– Ahaus667 16 points 3 years ago +16 / -0

“Guys we can’t regulate sexual activity!”

When you realize that the “freedoms” they fought for in “civil rights” were the freedoms to be irresponsible.

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▲ 4 ▼
– AntonioOfVenice 4 points 3 years ago +4 / -0

The right to vote?

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▲ 16 ▼
– Ahaus667 16 points 3 years ago +16 / -0

There’s a right to vote? Funny, here I thought that was a Woodrow Wilson invention.

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▲ 10 ▼
– AntonioOfVenice 10 points 3 years ago +10 / -0

As long as it doesn't matter and it doesn't change anything, there is.

Once the right to vote goes against the interests of the elites, it becomes an attack on democwacy.

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▲ 2 ▼
– APDSmith 2 points 3 years ago +2 / -0

becomes an attack on our democwacy.

FTFY

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▲ 10 ▼
– blackestknight 10 points 3 years ago +10 / -0

The Constitution doesn't even have the right to vote enumerated as an actual right. It only specificies that you can't limit voting on some enumerated characteristics like age, sex, race and that you can't charge a tax to vote.

14th says if they make you unable to vote for some reason other than the listed ones, you don't count towards representation towards allocating the number of house seats, thus affirming states can actually deny you the right to vote.

15th says you can't be removed the right to vote based on color, race or if you were previously a slave.

19th says you can't be denied the right to vote based on sex.

24th says you can't be forced to pay a poll tax to vote.

26th lowered the age to 18 from 21 and denies the capability of denying votes based on age.

So there's nothing in there that actually says "You have a right vote". They could go back to land ownership voters if they wanted and there's not a single constitutional amendment that would prevent them. They'd probably lose house seats based on the 14th and that's it.

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▲ 6 ▼
– Assassin47 6 points 3 years ago +6 / -0

They could go back to land ownership voters if they wanted

Fingers crossed!

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▲ 5 ▼
– Knife-TotingRat 5 points 3 years ago +5 / -0

They'll do that, after Gates et al own all the land (including each and every single-family home, to be converted to a "condo" that gives you the illusion of owning, and nothing more - real estate as a service, while the real owners will be whoever it is you pay those condo/HOA fees to.)

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▲ 4 ▼
– WhitePhoenix 4 points 3 years ago +4 / -0

So repeal the 19th, got it.

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▲ 4 ▼
– deleted 4 points 3 years ago +4 / -0
▲ 2 ▼
– cartoonericroberts 2 points 3 years ago +2 / -0

The right to vote (for gibs).

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▲ 11 ▼
– AntonioOfVenice 11 points 3 years ago +11 / -0

Very conservative of them to exclude "drinking the piss of 15 men".

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▲ 8 ▼
– SoctaticMethod1 8 points 3 years ago +8 / -0

I give it, a week or two before this becomes reality. With their record of turning satire into present, I'm always scared when they do a WW3 satire post

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▲ 5 ▼
– novanleon 5 points 3 years ago +5 / -0

This would truly complete the Sodom and Gomorrah comparison.

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▲ 12 ▼
– deleted 12 points 3 years ago +12 / -0
▲ 12 ▼
– when_we_win_remember 12 points 3 years ago +12 / -0

That really just tells you how consolidated is the formula industry vs the uh lubricating stuff industry. I don't think it tells you anything about priorities at all.

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▲ 8 ▼
– deleted 8 points 3 years ago +8 / -0
▲ 2 ▼
– deleted 2 points 3 years ago +2 / -0

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