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84
Why would you buy a 3000 dollar smart bed that can only work properly when connected to the internet (twitter.com)
posted 244 days ago by evilplushie 244 days ago by evilplushie +84 / -0
37 comments share
37 comments share save hide report block hide replies
Comments (37)
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▲ 37 ▼
– Sumsuch 37 points 244 days ago +37 / -0

I've become allergic to the word "smart".

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▲ 15 ▼
– MAGAnic316 15 points 244 days ago +15 / -0

Replace it with “dumb” and everything makes sense.

Dumbphone

Dumbwatch

Dumbcar

DumbTV

It’s all made to make us dumber.

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▲ 2 ▼
– 83671R18 2 points 244 days ago +2 / -0

But I like my Nokia 3310...

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▲ 1 ▼
– deleted 1 point 242 days ago +1 / -0
▲ 7 ▼
– 83671R18 7 points 244 days ago +7 / -0

I like the response: "Smart, or Self-Monitoring, Analysis, and Reporting Technology?"

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▲ 2 ▼
– PM-Melania-feet-pics 2 points 242 days ago +2 / -0

I've heard that, is it real or a backronym?

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▲ 13 ▼
– WrenchWring 13 points 244 days ago +13 / -0

Some people don't have souls. They are homunculi that exist only to consume products, such as EA's latest annual sports game and whatever the fuck this smart bed pod thing is. This is why the economy has remained relatively functional despite everything produced being worthless trash garbage shit vomit piles.

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▲ 12 ▼
– TheOutlaw 12 points 244 days ago +12 / -0

Because you're a retarded consoomer who opens your wallet for whatever slop woke corporations are offering up?

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▲ 8 ▼
– HallucinatoryBeing 8 points 244 days ago +8 / -0

>paying for a bed subscription

ISHYGDDT

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▲ 12 ▼
– TheOutlaw 12 points 244 days ago +12 / -0

It's only slightly more retarded than "smart" homes that require internet access and give big tech pedos access to all your info and the ability to seize control of your home's systems if you cross them.

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▲ 11 ▼
– 1776ReasonsWhy 11 points 244 days ago +11 / -0

Live in nice White suburbs

Have Smart House

Uncouth Urban Youths ambulate in proximity

"RACIAL SLURS DETECTED, HOUSE ENTERING SAFETY MODE"

Your thermostat, fridge, toilet, shower, lights, bed, washing machine/dryer, and WiFi are now disabled until you take a $400 Sensitivity Training course

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▲ 7 ▼
– SarcasticRidley 7 points 244 days ago +7 / -0

Please stop giving them ideas.

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▲ 7 ▼
– 1776ReasonsWhy 7 points 243 days ago +7 / -0

It's already happening. :^)

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▲ 2 ▼
– PM-Melania-feet-pics 2 points 242 days ago +2 / -0

I HATE THIS DYSTOPIA

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▲ 1 ▼
– PM-Melania-feet-pics 1 point 242 days ago +1 / -0

payment doesn't go through

bed starts chirping

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▲ 5 ▼
– OBRIENMUSTSUFFER 5 points 244 days ago +5 / -0

What does it do, does it like massage you or jerk you off while you sleep or something? Just fill your mattress full of snakes.

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▲ 5 ▼
– CaptainTrouble 5 points 244 days ago +5 / -0

They don't even sell a mattress? There's 0 way this "bed" doesn't work without internet. It's just an overpriced blanket warmer/cooler with a mattress cover too. Both can be swapped in an instant.

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▲ 10 ▼
– evilplushie [S] 10 points 244 days ago +10 / -0

Apparently the bed moves as well like hospital beds do so certain parts can go up and down for better posture. But changing it requires it to be connected to the internet and with the outage, some peoples beds were stuck in a w

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▲ 5 ▼
– ModsAreAIDS 5 points 244 days ago +5 / -0

But changing it requires it to be connected to the internet

No, it doesn't. But they couldn't sell every bit of data about you if it wasn't connected, hence the requirement.

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▲ 7 ▼
– evilplushie [S] 7 points 244 days ago +7 / -0

Sigh. I meant that right now changing it requires an internet connection and i would have thought that was obvious

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▲ 3 ▼
– ModsAreAIDS 3 points 244 days ago +3 / -0

I know what you meant. And my response was that the network connection is only required as a technicality for bullshit reasons. There is no possible technical reason that a network connection would ever be required for this functionality to work. You are defending their bullshit framing, so stop it.

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▲ 8 ▼
– evilplushie [S] 8 points 244 days ago +8 / -0

I'm not defending it. i'm pointing out that right now it needs an internet connection to function. Going but achually it doesn't is pedantic and obnoxious. Yes it could function without one but that's not what you're implying. You're implying that right now it doesn't need one when it's hard coded to need one right now.

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▲ 2 ▼
– ModsAreAIDS 2 points 244 days ago +2 / -0

It isn't pedantic. A service not working without an internet connection is not the same thing as a service being blocked due to lack of an internet connection. One implies it is necessary for the functionality of the service, and the other accurately portrays the scumfuckery that is actually happening here.

Words matter, and mealy mouthed euphemisms to downplay the severity of things is what faggots, leftists, and communists do to advance their agenda. Don't act like a faggot.

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▲ 12 ▼
– evilplushie [S] 12 points 244 days ago +12 / -0

Diablo IV needs an internet connection to work is very different from Diablo IV can be programmed to work without an internet connection.

I'm stating what is the current requirements needed for it to work not what you want. You should be less of a faggot

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▲ 5 ▼
– BeefyBelisarius 5 points 244 days ago +5 / -0

You're missing the point that it's a bad design, intentionally gimping the product so that the company can spy on the users and sell their data. Gullible idiots are paying a subscription for what's literally a worse hospital bed bundled with a worse electric blanket.

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▲ 4 ▼
– Sneak_King 4 points 244 days ago +4 / -0

inb4 i won't sleep in the pod

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▲ 3 ▼
– Royalseq 3 points 244 days ago +3 / -0

I actually own one of these.. It doesn't require an internet connection to move it or heat or cool. It just has an AI component that adjusts the height and the temperature based on the kind of sleep you're currently having (cools down when you're in deep sleep and heats up to wake you up). If you're snoring for example it will lift you head up slightly without waking you but enough to stop the snoring.

The AI component of it was down, so it didn't automatically do the shit, but you could still manually do the shit. You also don't have to pay for the subscription or connect it to the internet, it still works you just won't have the AI that's basically bundled with it for the first year.

The company got in the shit because they sent the DOGE team a bunch of stuff for free in support of them as a marketing move.

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▲ 1 ▼
– deleted 1 point 243 days ago +1 / -0
▲ 3 ▼
– YouAreAPirate 3 points 244 days ago +3 / -0

What if I sleep on a bed without a subscription? Does it snap shut and crush me inside? More importantly, why is the bed connected to the internet? Where's Uncle Ted so he can explain this shit.

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▲ 3 ▼
– WitchHunterSiegfried 3 points 244 days ago +3 / -0

Unironically close, apparently it goes into a V like shape to prevent you from using it, which is what happened here.

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▲ 2 ▼
– evilplushie [S] 2 points 244 days ago +2 / -0

i imagine it then becomes a very expensive dumb bed if there's no net conn

although there's heating elements in the bed so it might be stuck on heater mode

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▲ 3 ▼
– YouAreAPirate 3 points 244 days ago +3 / -0

Instead of burning a hole in your wallet, the bed just burns you alive instead.

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▲ 3 ▼
– ApathySK 3 points 243 days ago +3 / -0

Some 10 or so years ago there was an outage like this, and people were locked out of their smart homes. Anything "smart" is unnecessarily stupid.

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▲ 2 ▼
– RondoOBlongo 2 points 243 days ago +2 / -0

Because corpos need more intrusive methods to display ads and scrape user data

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▲ 1 ▼
– AntonioOfVenice 1 point 243 days ago +1 / -0

LOL, they're literally calling it 'Pod'.

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▲ 1 ▼
– Grumman 1 point 244 days ago +1 / -0

Presumably because they're sleep deprived.

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▲ 1 ▼
– ThreeLights 1 point 243 days ago +1 / -0

That shit is cancer. They advertise a 3k with subscription cool/warming mat with sound machine.

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