I can honestly see how it could be considered a form of manipulation, just by the sheer pressure it exerts.
The problem here is that, much like a lot of "feministy" points, is that it ascribes intentions when there are none. No guy who is willing to go through the effort of including the whole family honestly thinks he needs to use them, he is doing it because he is certain she will say yes and he wants to make it extra special.
So, like always, its women creating a problem with men trying to do nice things for them. Up to and including having a relationship where there is such a disconnect that he can think something so wrong.
Some men are delusional. I proposed to my wife over tater tots at a bar. It was pretty much, "okay fine, let's do this, in or out?" and she was super in.
I knew a guy who proposed to his "girl friend" (as in he was friendzoned) on the Vegas strip with a 5k ring he bought. Never even kissed her. Of course she said no. Some guys get way wrapped up in their own heads.
TV and such is part of the problem, selling men delusions about how women and romance work. Most guys usually have some formational experiences that teach them reality but lately more and more guys go through life believing total nonsense about women.
Shit I woke mine up at like 2 am to just say I was thinking about it, and we just rolled from there. Because I knew her answer already, which is the most important thing. If you don't know her answer already you failed from the word go.
I had a female friend get proposed to while sitting on the couch disheveled from a long work day. Nothing fancy, he just asked straight up with no ring. Exact same scenario as my own, but she was offended by how awful the whole thing was and rejected it just because she didn't want that to be a key memory.
At the risk of sounding like some after school PSA, too many people have let media ruin their minds and have no idea what their own relationship is and do zero real communication regarding it. Women with their evasive BS certainly don't help in that regard.
They were in the slow process of breaking up anyway. I and she both think it was his way of panic trying to fix a relationship that was already ending. She's not much of a catch but homeboy couldn't provide a fulfilling life to anyone so its for the best it fizzled there. He has a chance to fix his shit and she is hitched to someone much more on her level.
I asked my then girlfriend how she wanted to be proposed to, she dropped to a knee and asked me. I was genuinely asking, but she was too excited to care.
To allow them to completely remove the possibility of agency from women, rendering them basically cattle - and this is how feminists think of women, not me, although feminists, of course, play word games to avoid confronting this - they must then ascribe the most malicious, spiteful motivations possible to men to account for feminism's many failures.
Yeah, people have a tendency to form pretty clueless commentary and feedback. Not exactly something new, save for the derpy feminist narrative. (Which isn't new either so much as more widely spread and increasingly deranged)
Regardless of the commentary, really depends on the situation and individuals. Some people clearly aren't the sort who'll handle that much attention and pressure, making it a poor decision to place them under the spotlight like that unnecessarily. Maybe the guy's just overenthusiastic and lacking tact, maybe the chick's just unstable and finally revealing her true colors.
Not sure what else there is to say, this isn't exactly a significant example of anything other run of the mill human error with a dash of retarded woke commentary.
Years ago, I saw a man take his wife to center court to propose during a timeout at a Houston Rockets game, in front of over ten thousand people...and she said NO.
It's a yes or no thing regardless of whether or not family is present, though if I were to retort - a "no" is just as important as a "yes", why is it so condemnable that a man would go out of his way to really make sure you meant "no" or in the best case scenario a very memorable and binding "yes"?
I can honestly see how it could be considered a form of manipulation, just by the sheer pressure it exerts.
The problem here is that, much like a lot of "feministy" points, is that it ascribes intentions when there are none. No guy who is willing to go through the effort of including the whole family honestly thinks he needs to use them, he is doing it because he is certain she will say yes and he wants to make it extra special.
So, like always, its women creating a problem with men trying to do nice things for them. Up to and including having a relationship where there is such a disconnect that he can think something so wrong.
Some men are delusional. I proposed to my wife over tater tots at a bar. It was pretty much, "okay fine, let's do this, in or out?" and she was super in.
I knew a guy who proposed to his "girl friend" (as in he was friendzoned) on the Vegas strip with a 5k ring he bought. Never even kissed her. Of course she said no. Some guys get way wrapped up in their own heads.
TV and such is part of the problem, selling men delusions about how women and romance work. Most guys usually have some formational experiences that teach them reality but lately more and more guys go through life believing total nonsense about women.
Shit I woke mine up at like 2 am to just say I was thinking about it, and we just rolled from there. Because I knew her answer already, which is the most important thing. If you don't know her answer already you failed from the word go.
I had a female friend get proposed to while sitting on the couch disheveled from a long work day. Nothing fancy, he just asked straight up with no ring. Exact same scenario as my own, but she was offended by how awful the whole thing was and rejected it just because she didn't want that to be a key memory.
At the risk of sounding like some after school PSA, too many people have let media ruin their minds and have no idea what their own relationship is and do zero real communication regarding it. Women with their evasive BS certainly don't help in that regard.
what's the follow up on that story? did she miss the chance to get a fulfilled married life because she didn't want that key memory at the moment?
They were in the slow process of breaking up anyway. I and she both think it was his way of panic trying to fix a relationship that was already ending. She's not much of a catch but homeboy couldn't provide a fulfilling life to anyone so its for the best it fizzled there. He has a chance to fix his shit and she is hitched to someone much more on her level.
I asked my then girlfriend how she wanted to be proposed to, she dropped to a knee and asked me. I was genuinely asking, but she was too excited to care.
It's part of the trade feminists make.
To allow them to completely remove the possibility of agency from women, rendering them basically cattle - and this is how feminists think of women, not me, although feminists, of course, play word games to avoid confronting this - they must then ascribe the most malicious, spiteful motivations possible to men to account for feminism's many failures.
You're making some assumptions yourself. Pressure may have been a factor in his decision (or it might not have).
It happens.
The thing is that certain kinds of social status / pressure / etc are literally the things women want.
It's literally the SNL meme where if you were tom brady she'd be ecstatic you proposed in front of her parents.
Yeah, people have a tendency to form pretty clueless commentary and feedback. Not exactly something new, save for the derpy feminist narrative. (Which isn't new either so much as more widely spread and increasingly deranged)
Regardless of the commentary, really depends on the situation and individuals. Some people clearly aren't the sort who'll handle that much attention and pressure, making it a poor decision to place them under the spotlight like that unnecessarily. Maybe the guy's just overenthusiastic and lacking tact, maybe the chick's just unstable and finally revealing her true colors.
Not sure what else there is to say, this isn't exactly a significant example of anything other run of the mill human error with a dash of retarded woke commentary.
Years ago, I saw a man take his wife to center court to propose during a timeout at a Houston Rockets game, in front of over ten thousand people...and she said NO.
She can say no wherever she wants.
In fact, here's the video.
Edit: Girlfriend, not wife. I should have proofread.
Wait, he took his wife? Did she agree later?
My mistake, fixed. Thank you.
It's a yes or no thing regardless of whether or not family is present, though if I were to retort - a "no" is just as important as a "yes", why is it so condemnable that a man would go out of his way to really make sure you meant "no" or in the best case scenario a very memorable and binding "yes"?
Can someone explain to me how people can propose marriage to people they are unsure of what the answer will be?
I would only ask someone to marry me if I already knew she'd say yes.
Women aren't subtle when they want a ring. The problem is they are subtle when they are stringing you along hoping for someone better.
Very good point.
this also kind of answered why date someone for long term if marriage isn't on the table
I find these things funny because my always-single or "married because they got lucky once" friends would say this...
But my more player friends would not, as they're familiar with girls fickle nature.
Many girls think about this stuff with the same thinking process - that men use - for relatively trivial things like ordering from amazon.
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