For the vast majority of men, the world is colder and crueler than women will ever be able to understand or comprehend. Men can go months without a single compliment and years without a single person every telling them that they appreciate them for the sacrifices that they make.
Most men go thru so much of their lives unappreciated, that when they do find a person who truly appreciates them they will literally sacrifice their lives to protect that person.
I have been called attractive by a random woman exactly one time in my life, not counting things like obvious flattery. I was literally struck dumb by it. I had no idea what to do because I hadn't even considered the possibility it would ever happen. I'm more mentally prepared to encounter an alien species than be complimented. Women can't even begin to fathom what it's like to live that way.
And before an unfunny person accuses me of just being some hideous incel who cannot into woman, I'm married.
Actually, the compliment came well after I got married. But had it not, I can assure you I would have taken her out to lunch before never hearing from her again.
Yeah, women are routinely shocked when men actually express their normal conditions of:
No one will help you
You'll have to always rise to the occasion, regardless of difficulty or arrangements against you
No one will tell you they appreciate you
No one will notice you
No one will seek your attention
When they are confronted by how men live their normal everyday lives, they are: shocked, hurt, and feel horribly alone. They literally have no idea what men go through on a normal basis when we are not even having a bad day.
Iirc Norah Vincent, a lesbian who spent some time dressing, looking, and acting as a man to see what it was like "on the other side" was really beaten down by the experience (probably an understatement, really). Wrote a book about it too, Self Made Man.
What's interesting to me is that book is 16 years old now so I'd love to see another woman do the same thing today. I'd imagine all the troubles Vincent ran into would be a lot more intense today.
In fairness, I don't think all of it was just about being a man. Part of it was that she had basically given herself an identity crisis, not too unlike gender dysphoria (without actually being dysphoria). The shock to your morale from a "loss of self" can be very brutal if you're not prepared for it, and there's no way that she was.
Comedian Lila Hart made a great comment about this the other day: https://twitter.com/lovelilahart/status/1546013490695004160
I have been called attractive by a random woman exactly one time in my life, not counting things like obvious flattery. I was literally struck dumb by it. I had no idea what to do because I hadn't even considered the possibility it would ever happen. I'm more mentally prepared to encounter an alien species than be complimented. Women can't even begin to fathom what it's like to live that way.
And before an unfunny person accuses me of just being some hideous incel who cannot into woman, I'm married.
Even ugly chicks get complimented daily if they're on dating apps or spend any real time in public.
You married the girl that complimented you, didn't you?
Actually, the compliment came well after I got married. But had it not, I can assure you I would have taken her out to lunch before never hearing from her again.
So the one you married never called you attractive?
Yeah, women are routinely shocked when men actually express their normal conditions of:
When they are confronted by how men live their normal everyday lives, they are: shocked, hurt, and feel horribly alone. They literally have no idea what men go through on a normal basis when we are not even having a bad day.
Iirc Norah Vincent, a lesbian who spent some time dressing, looking, and acting as a man to see what it was like "on the other side" was really beaten down by the experience (probably an understatement, really). Wrote a book about it too, Self Made Man.
What's interesting to me is that book is 16 years old now so I'd love to see another woman do the same thing today. I'd imagine all the troubles Vincent ran into would be a lot more intense today.
In fairness, I don't think all of it was just about being a man. Part of it was that she had basically given herself an identity crisis, not too unlike gender dysphoria (without actually being dysphoria). The shock to your morale from a "loss of self" can be very brutal if you're not prepared for it, and there's no way that she was.