TeeSpring Cancels Antifa
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"It'S iN tHe NAmE!"
Dateline: Heaven
In a surprising move, God has renamed Himself to God-That-Totally-Exists. He reports that this is part of His new Antifa-inspired rebranding effort to tap in to the wider market of people who have previously refused to acknowledge His existence.
Giving a rare interview, God-That-Totally-Exists said "I have to admit I was surprised when I found out this was even possible. I invented this whole language thing so I could talk the universe into existence and the idea of permanently baking things like intent and moral certitude into otherwise unrelated nouns was definitely not in the original design spec. If it were I would've suggested Adam name pigs 'disgusting' instead and saved My chosen people a lot of trouble. After all, why have tons of dietary strictures if you can just encode abhorrence and vileness straight into bacon?"
Asked if He'd be shortening His new name to GTTE, He said "No, I'm going the Prince route and picking a symbol. It's not finalized or anything but we are in talks with Wal-Mart for use of the smiley. I figure if My name's got existence nailed down I might as well see if we can also corner happiness with the abbreviation, right?"
He then said "Checkmate, atheists!", manifested a microphone and dropped it on the floor, and left the room by levitating straight through the ceiling.
Dateline is a true crime show though
Not sure if a joke or not.
The dateline is the opening line of a news report, sometimes rendered in a different font like small caps, that states the location and date (though the date is often omitted, amusingly enough) of the described event. It's a very old meme that when reading a paper report for another medium the newscaster specifically declares when he's reading the dateline. It might have been used unironically back in the 1940s and 1950s, but I can only firsthand recall it being used in parody: The Muppet newscaster would occasionally do it, for instance. The US version of the game Rampage on the Commodore 64 did as well.
Wasn't a joke, I'm a big true crime fan. My bad for the misunderstanding.
No worries.
"So when are you guys moving to the Democratic People's Republic of Korea, then? The name sounds awesome, and that's all that matters, right?"
Trying to explain fascism to them is impossible too, since it sounds exactly like the New Deal and FDR.
Once upon a time most "NPC" types went to church instead of going to riots. They might have still had a one track mind, but at least they contributed to society.
My group is called LOGIC AND REASON CLUB
We believe that the earth is a giant frisbee. The only reason to disagree with us is because you don't believe in logic and reason.
Look! It's right there in the fucking name.
Why is this so difficult, fascist? Fuck you. Fuck you
They probably will say that as men are still so dominant in society, they don’t need human rights.
Hey friend, glad to see you here (I am Kicked_Outta_KIA on reddit)
No, KiA2 disappeared on reddit. Sorry you got banned.
"If you oppose PETA, you believe animals should be tortured" is probably a better one, because everyone with half a brain cell opposes PETA while they can go through mental gymnastics for MRAs.
I don't care what happens to animals as long as they taste good when I eat them
"So you admit Nazis were Socialist?"
They'd probably dispute the "national" part, as they're generally international socialists.
Feminists don't really like men having rights tbf.
Antifa is doubling down on attacking Teespring on Twitter. I hope the hold the line. It's literal terrorist branding for merchandise.
...and everybody is laughing them.
They even tried using glowie "right wing organizations" like Boogaloo Boys as an example of why they should be allowed to stay, but nobody cared.
One of the brave&strongs from that thread listed BlueLivesMatter as an alt-right organization.
Can you imagine if mainstream journalists weren't covering for this movement? They'd of been laughed off the stage the moment they stepped on it.
Teespring is just showing them the door.
It's a private company.
No refunds.
FrEEdoM oF sPeEcH DOesN't mEaN fReEdOm fROm CONseQuEnCeS
But I could have swore that democrat Senators said that Antifa is a myth and refused to condemn them recently at a hearing on the riots in Portland.
Why would an outlet refuse to make tee's for a nonexistent group? Furthermore, why would a nonexistent group need tee's?
Those comments in the tweet are prime comedy, though.
Anyone wanna join my new group anti-bad? We're against all things bad so everything we do is good and if you're against us then you're bad and prepare to be met with justice, violent justice.
Username DOES NOT check out!
How can they cancel antifa if antifa doesn't exist?
Boy, for an anticapitalist group that doesn't exist, Antifa sure has a lot of merch.
Holy shit
I never would have pointed to teespring as having the balls to do something like this
I bet they'll fold by next week.
Thats pretty good. Really great hearing some companies coming out against the madness.
If you truly don't believe in fascism or violence, then distance yourself from the bad actors. Form a different group.
Imagine trying to claim that you identify as a nazi, but dont believe in throwing Jewish people in the oven, because you are one of the good nazis. Nobody is going to buy that!. Same with Klan, etc. The names/garb are too tarnished.
Antifa/BLM are at that point, where they are just bad news in many people's minds
Nazis and KKK > Antifa and BLM
But then the grand question is "Will they let us make Anti-Antifa tee-shirts?"
They're called Tifa T-shirts, or TiT-shirts for short.
I like this comment a lot