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27
NASA to change names of planets and other celestial bodies deemed "offensive" (disrn.com)
posted 5 years ago by CommaWriter 5 years ago by CommaWriter +27 / -0
19 comments share
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Comments (19)
sorted by:
▲ 20 ▼
– MelisandeScott 20 points 5 years ago +20 / -0

NASA’s Associate Administrator for Diversity and Equal Opportunity

Oh, FFS, not only is this a thing, but the guy is the "Associate Administrator", meaning there's multiple levels of managers in the department. What a waste of money.

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▲ 15 ▼
– Kweebecker 15 points 5 years ago +15 / -0

"I wonder why we're over budget?" Muses the associate junior administrator for Useless Unimportant Activities to the junior associate junior administrator for Redundant Useless Unimportant Activities.

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▲ 10 ▼
– lgbtqwtfbbq 10 points 5 years ago +10 / -0

Then when politicians cut their budgets the administrators decide to "punish" them by slashing the actually beneficial programs first. Which makes the public think these departments are under-funded when in reality the administrators are just petty and incompetent.

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▲ 12 ▼
– NoUsernameNecessary 12 points 5 years ago +12 / -0

Guess that explains why they stopped sending people into space, and now rely on private companies to do it for them, diversity hires probably aren't that good at rocket science.

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▲ 4 ▼
– MBII 4 points 5 years ago +4 / -0

What a bullshit job title that has no reason to exist

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▲ 19 ▼
– Happily_Grim 19 points 5 years ago +19 / -0

Just wait for the, "Venus represents the theological objectification of women as sex objects by early misogynistic white men who weren't content with simply colonizing earth, so they sought to spread their toxic masculinity to even the planets and stars above!"
I think I sound pretty close! I'm sure the New York Times will be posting articles like this within the week.

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▲ 14 ▼
– MelisandeScott 14 points 5 years ago +14 / -0

Next would be: "The name Jupiter is a relic of our patriarchal history, celebrating a time when powerful male deities took mortal women prisoner, subjecting them to rape and abuse. Women should be able to look into the sky at night, without being reminded of the atrocities inflicted upon their foremothers and sisters. From now on, the planet Jupiter will be known as 'Harriet Tubman'."

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▲ 10 ▼
– CommaWriter [S] 10 points 5 years ago +10 / -0

"Mars is named after the Roman god of war, befitting the toxic masculinity shown by the patriarchy even during the times of the so-called cultured Roman Empire. Since we do not want peace-loving people to get triggered by thoughts of war and violence whenever they see the red planet in the sky, we have opted to change its name from Mars to Big Brother so people will learn how to love each other like brothers siblings."

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▲ 14 ▼
– Steampunk_Moustache 14 points 5 years ago +14 / -0

We must rename planet Earth to planet Water.

After all, all rocky planets have earth, but this is the only one we know of with liquid water, and that liquid water covers 75% of its surface. Isn't it bizarre that we call a planet that is 75% water 'Earth'? Why do we do that?

Like so many other insane conventions that skew our perception of reality, the reason is simple: Patriarchy.

Earth is a solid, rigid mass. Dirty, messy. It is male. Water is fluid, flowing, formless, soothing, cleansing. It is Female, and it's Queer.

If NASA are truly committed to smashing the patriarchy out of space, they need to refer to our Mother Water (sounds just like the womb, doesn't it?) by Her true name.

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▲ 4 ▼
– Galean 4 points 5 years ago +4 / -0

You need a Pulitzer ASAP for this essay.

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▲ 1 ▼
– Steampunk_Moustache 1 point 5 years ago +1 / -0

If I had a vagina and was writing a thesis on the right subject, I'm unironically certain I could score a master's degree with such statements.

Sarkeesian managed it.

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▲ 8 ▼
– Kweebecker 8 points 5 years ago +8 / -0

We should go back to the Baylonian names, if only so when Mars' moon impacts it, knocks it off orbit, and eventually pushes it into colliding with Earth, we can get to say that Papa Nergal is finally coming to visit us.

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▲ 7 ▼
– deleted 7 points 5 years ago +7 / -0
▲ 7 ▼
– Galean 7 points 5 years ago +7 / -0

Will they change Uranus or not?

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▲ 7 ▼
– ArrogantMustard 7 points 5 years ago +7 / -0

Yep. It's now called Urectum.

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▲ 6 ▼
– PalaeolithicRaccoon 6 points 5 years ago +6 / -0

If it were pronounced the way Greeks do, it wouldn't be a problem. oor-AHN-os. But the so-called scholars who transliterated Greek for us were horrible at it, and had no real ability to actually read Greek.

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▲ 3 ▼
– MBII 3 points 5 years ago +3 / -0

Your anus is better though.

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▲ 5 ▼
– MBII 5 points 5 years ago +5 / -0

Deemed offensive by WHO?

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▲ 2 ▼
– InverseFlip 2 points 5 years ago +2 / -0

NGC 2392, just rolls off the tongue, unlike the Eskimo Nebula

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