Like... if he is honest about how he feels about boundaries in a relationship, why is that abusive? As long as she is given those clearly, and she can decide how to proceed, then I see no reason why it would be abuse.
Not saying I agree with him, but that's irrelevant.
But Sarah insisted she didn’t necessarily think her former partner is a “terrible person.”
She wrote: “Someone being an emotionally abusive partner doesn’t mean they’re a terrible person (often stems from their own trauma)
“At the same time, it doesn’t mean it’s OK.(sic)”
This is the abusive part. Abusing your position as a former fuck buddy of a celebrity to push your name into the media and hurt them, all while you try to take the high road.
You'd be surprised how dumb modern women can be about relationship boundaries. I've seen married women with kids just wearing yoga pants so thin you can can very clearly see the pantylines. The husband just goes along with it and this is in a supposed conservative asian country. Its much worse in the west
Some really are NPCs who can't objectively gauge whether a certain action is objectionable. They observe too-tight yoga pants becoming mainstream and add it to their wardrobe, as popularity is their only barometer.
A continuation of baseline behavior is consciously seeing how a woman reacts to reasonable and unreasonable feedback. If she's swallowed the propaganda that conflicting preferences are "controlling behaviors", just walk out before any argument brews. If she's an emotionally tangled people pleaser, she's not contributing to the relationship and is just as bad as the "modern woman".
Woe to any man who doesn't figure this shit out past 25 years of age.
He knew from the beginning she was a surf instructor and posted swimsuit pics on her IG when he met her. If he had said at the beginning "I would like to date you but I have some issues with some things you're currently doing that would need to change." then IMO that's fine- she can decide if she's willing to stop doing that before agreeing to date.
But it seems he appears to have brought these "boundaries", including excluding half the population as her business clientele, midway into the relationship to be rather sus- plus I'm predisposed not to believe Hill in the 1st place.
Still it's not like they were married/had kids/etc (were they even living together?) so if he decided, honestly or not, to bring "no pictures of yourself in a bathing suit" and other rules in there's nothing really stopping her from saying no and telling him to either accept that or they'd part ways.
I could see this very easily as him being abusive- he was cool with her doing all that before he hooked her then Mr Woke Liberal suddenly decides a woman posting thong pics is unacceptable? Plus some of his demands like "no modelling", "no bathing suit (not even just bikini) pics" & "no surfing with men" are controlling & unhealthy- it would be on par for abusers to mix it in with more reasonable requests like "no posting sexual pictures", "inappropriate friendships with men" (assuming what he means by "inappropriate" is reasonable) and concern about hanging out with people in bad places.
Trying to control a woman's source of income (by removing half the population as potential clients) is abusive, yes. Saying she can't post pics in a bathing suit to her Insta (I don't think the thong thing is as bad) is controlling & thus abusive, yes.
But definitely pathetic he doesn't trust her around other men.
I'm sure all the guys who take surf lessons from the woman who posts swimsuit pics of herself on the internet do so out of deep respect for her surfing talents and not for some other reason.
there's nothing really stopping her from saying no and telling him to either accept that or they'd part ways.
If this is on the table, then its not abuse. Its a man having insecurities and trying to approach the topic with his partner.
Being weak and going about it the wrong way aren't abuse unless women are so pathetic they don't have the agency to resist anything men say. Which I'm guessing you don't think that is the case, so cheapening abuse that much is just infantilizing women and hurting them even more by telling them they were "abused, thereby traumatized" rather than able to just say No.
If a woman has thong swimsuit photos on social media before the man starts a relationship, he deserves any resulting inconveniences and calamity heading his way. That's worse than nude-art, as women wear beach-thongs in family friendly venues.
Remember that while 14 yr olds can consent to puberty blockers and double mastectomies, 22 yr olds simply lack the maturity & can't consent to dating a 48 yr old.
Like... if he is honest about how he feels about boundaries in a relationship, why is that abusive? As long as she is given those clearly, and she can decide how to proceed, then I see no reason why it would be abuse.
Not saying I agree with him, but that's irrelevant.
This is the abusive part. Abusing your position as a former fuck buddy of a celebrity to push your name into the media and hurt them, all while you try to take the high road.
Couldn't have happened to a nicer guy though.
It's always the man's fault.
There is a popular videogame streamer ( Ninja? ) whose wife forbade him to do collabs with women.
He was branded as a misogynist for not letting women ride his success.
His wife didn't forbid it, he deliberately refused to stream with women out of respect for her.
It is his fault for explicitly stating his boundaries and expecting her to abide by them.
She should be so afraid of losing him that she restricts her own actions before they came anywhere near to the edges of his sensibilities.
But that obviously isn't the case.
You'd be surprised how dumb modern women can be about relationship boundaries. I've seen married women with kids just wearing yoga pants so thin you can can very clearly see the pantylines. The husband just goes along with it and this is in a supposed conservative asian country. Its much worse in the west
They aren't dumb, they are attention whores. It is a shit test to see if their current guy is "man enough" to tell her "no".
Some really are NPCs who can't objectively gauge whether a certain action is objectionable. They observe too-tight yoga pants becoming mainstream and add it to their wardrobe, as popularity is their only barometer.
A continuation of baseline behavior is consciously seeing how a woman reacts to reasonable and unreasonable feedback. If she's swallowed the propaganda that conflicting preferences are "controlling behaviors", just walk out before any argument brews. If she's an emotionally tangled people pleaser, she's not contributing to the relationship and is just as bad as the "modern woman".
Woe to any man who doesn't figure this shit out past 25 years of age.
He knew from the beginning she was a surf instructor and posted swimsuit pics on her IG when he met her. If he had said at the beginning "I would like to date you but I have some issues with some things you're currently doing that would need to change." then IMO that's fine- she can decide if she's willing to stop doing that before agreeing to date.
But it seems he appears to have brought these "boundaries", including excluding half the population as her business clientele, midway into the relationship to be rather sus- plus I'm predisposed not to believe Hill in the 1st place.
Still it's not like they were married/had kids/etc (were they even living together?) so if he decided, honestly or not, to bring "no pictures of yourself in a bathing suit" and other rules in there's nothing really stopping her from saying no and telling him to either accept that or they'd part ways.
I could see this very easily as him being abusive- he was cool with her doing all that before he hooked her then Mr Woke Liberal suddenly decides a woman posting thong pics is unacceptable? Plus some of his demands like "no modelling", "no bathing suit (not even just bikini) pics" & "no surfing with men" are controlling & unhealthy- it would be on par for abusers to mix it in with more reasonable requests like "no posting sexual pictures", "inappropriate friendships with men" (assuming what he means by "inappropriate" is reasonable) and concern about hanging out with people in bad places.
None of that is abusive lol
Unreasonable? Sure
Pathetic? Okay
You can call it many things, but "abusive" isn't one of them.
Abuse is another one of those words that's been used improperly to the point that it no longer holds the weight or meaning it once did.
It's almost like its been... Hm.... I know there's a word for it, but I can't quite put my finger on it.
Trying to control a woman's source of income (by removing half the population as potential clients) is abusive, yes. Saying she can't post pics in a bathing suit to her Insta (I don't think the thong thing is as bad) is controlling & thus abusive, yes.
But definitely pathetic he doesn't trust her around other men.
So if your wife wants to bang other dudes for money, and you try to stop her, that's abusive?
I'm sure all the guys who take surf lessons from the woman who posts swimsuit pics of herself on the internet do so out of deep respect for her surfing talents and not for some other reason.
People dont realise social media is just another form of dating app for even average women
If this is on the table, then its not abuse. Its a man having insecurities and trying to approach the topic with his partner.
Being weak and going about it the wrong way aren't abuse unless women are so pathetic they don't have the agency to resist anything men say. Which I'm guessing you don't think that is the case, so cheapening abuse that much is just infantilizing women and hurting them even more by telling them they were "abused, thereby traumatized" rather than able to just say No.
If a woman has thong swimsuit photos on social media before the man starts a relationship, he deserves any resulting inconveniences and calamity heading his way. That's worse than nude-art, as women wear beach-thongs in family friendly venues.
Are you saying that you think what he said was WORSE and she lied and edited the messages she chose to leak to paint him more favorably?
Because by their own logic women are sheep and stupid. If you present something to them they are compelled towards it.
That's why adult women dating old ass Leo aren't a problem, he is the problem by presenting them the opportunity to do so.
Remember that while 14 yr olds can consent to puberty blockers and double mastectomies, 22 yr olds simply lack the maturity & can't consent to dating a 48 yr old.