DUDE i just LOVE the hustle and bustle of the big city, it’s so DYNAMIC and makes me feel like i’m in one of my favourite TV SHOWS. you should totally come on down to my studio apartment, it’s above a freakin’ COSTCO, it’s got EXPOSED RED BRICK walls and everything, we can crack open a nice hoppy ipa or three and get crazy watching some cartoons on adult swim! and dude, dude, DUDE, we have GOTTA go down to the COSTCO barcade- listen here, right, it’s a BAR where us ADULTS who do ADULTING can go DRINK in a COSTCO. BUT!!!! it’s also an ARCADE like when we were kids, so we can play awesome VIDEO GAMES, without dumb kids bothering us. speaking of which megan and i have finally decided to tie the knot- literally -we’re both getting snipped tomorrow at the hospital, that way we can save money to spent more on ourselves and our COSTCO GOLD MEMBERSHIPS. i’m fuckin JACKED man, i’m gonna SLAM this craft beer and pop open another one!!!
This is less soybeard and more like I'm going to move in my entire extended family above Costco and never consoom a non-Kirkland product again.
Send your kid down for samples every morning -
“See if they have breakfast sausages this time!”
I think they only do that on the weekends.
If you’re truly Kirkland-Pilled you’ll get them to write it into the condo contract
Thank you for this comment, it caught me off guard and I laughed my ass off.
kek
Please god let these types of people, who are real despite this parody, neuter themselves.