[BEE] 11 Woke Changes Coming to Grand Theft Auto
(babylonbee.com)
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GTA 6 will not use guns, instead you will debate who is the bigger intersectional victim and take damage from micro aggressions
Maybe you can misgender people to kill them. That would be at least funny
Playing the game your characters have a 41% chance to randomly attempt suicide at any given moment
If they put that in the game I'd buy it.
Not too far off.
Even though I love the Bee, you have to admit we are living in some upside down times when a Christian satire site is effectively dunking on Rockstar.
Single player campaign lasts 5 hours and only uses 30% of map locations. Everything else is for microtransaction online play.
Nah, if you beat on Asian NPCs as a black character, you immediately lose all stars and the police halt their pursuit and start chanting "Stop Asian Hate!" at white NPCs.
There won't be money in the game. Instead the currency is woke points. You earn woke points by murdering whites, participating in riots, and sucking off tranny prostitutes. You lose woke points if your character harms anyone higher on the pecking order than they are or fails to fall to their knees and beg for "girl dick" when a tranny walks by. If you lose all your woke points your character is executed at the gallows in the name of love and tolerance and it's game over.
God bless The Bee.
Shots fired...so to speak. :(