Here are some more shit takes from this mainstream propaganda screed:

When I was growing up in the 1990s, the Black girls in my neighborhood had VHS watch parties featuring “The Little Mermaid.” We persuaded our parents to buy us “Little Mermaid’ comforter sets and light-up sneakers, and we obsessed over Ariel. We wanted to be her, even though with her white skin and straight hair she didn’t resemble us at all.

Wow imagine that… identifying with a character that doesn’t need to physically resemble you?? UNBELIEVABLE… who could have thought this kind of advanced level of thinking was even possible???? Dumbass.

That’s not the only reason for the overwhelming excitement. This “Little Mermaid” promises to send a better message to girls. “The Little Mermaid” that my friends and I obsessed over isn’t an empowering tale. After [Ariel] encounters the human, Eric, she trades her beautiful singing voice and mermaid tail for a pair of legs so she can pursue a relationship with him. Her arrangement with the sea witch, Ursula, offers Ariel new beginnings, but she’s also forced to sacrifice all the things that make her who she is for the possible love of a man.

Oh nooooo, somebody falling in love and willing to make sacrifices for that love, instead of wanting to be a 100% self-centered narcissistic bitch like most 2020s women?? DATS UN POSSIBEL!!!1111

Given the updated message in the film, it’s important that Bailey was able to keep her locs, again not sacrificing who she is to play the role: “It was super important for me to have my natural hair in this film. I was really grateful to (director) Rob Marshall, because he wanted to keep my locs,” she told Ebony. “It’s always important to have somebody to cosign. I’ve had my locs since I was 5, so they’re a huge part of who I am. We need to be able to see ourselves, we need to be able to see our hair on big screens like this, so that we know that it’s beautiful and more than acceptable.”

It’s fucking hair. HAIR. This is like a bald old guy saying “I’m so glad they replaced Captain America with a fat old man who is balding like me… WE NEED TO BE ABLE TO SEE OUR (LACK OF) HAIR ON THE BIG SCREEN!!!!111

Yes, Bailey is playing a mermaid, a fictional character, but her portrayal is likely to be a catalyst for those who want to better understand the mythology of Black mermaids and other water spirits across cultures, regions and time periods. There’s Yemaya, goddess of the ocean, who, according to those who practice Santería, created the seven seas. Ariel isn’t a visual embodiment of these deities but Bailey playing her is a prompt to remember that Europeans aren’t the only ones whose culture includes beautiful, feminine water spirits.

Then why the fuck are you hijacking the European version and turning it “Black”??? Why not do a movie about THOSE legends?