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52
How Heterosexual Couples Met (From /r/DataIsBeautiful) (media.kotakuinaction2.win)
posted 1 year ago by LastRights 1 year ago by LastRights +52 / -0
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▲ 14 ▼
– Grant_us_eyes 14 points 1 year ago +14 / -0

I'm kind of skeptical. Not because of HR, but because every women I stumble across when working is either not single, engaged, or married.

Single women on the ground nowadays is very fucking sparse, and seemingly impossible to come across organically. For me, atleast.

...you know, thinking on the matter, this might be part of a cascade effect. More single men not getting married mean less opportunity for the still single men of their group to encounter single women.

The reason I say this is because the only time I have stumbled across single women, it was because of the wife of a good friend of mine. I've met more single women because of her than I ever have because of my friends group, and I've known them alot longer than I've known her.

Huh. I wonder if anyone else has experience similar.

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▲ 15 ▼
– The_Shadow_of_Intent 15 points 1 year ago +15 / -0

The reason I say this is because the only time I have stumbled across single women, it was because of the wife of a good friend of mine. I've met more single women because of her than I ever have because of my friends group, and I've known them alot longer than I've known her.

That's actually sort of what you should expect. Not from that particular person, but you get to know more girls the more people you get to know in general. If your current social circle doesn't have a lot of single women in their orbit, don't necessarily replace them, but just expand your circle by going out of your way to make friends with new people. You never know what kind of connections will come together.

For example, I talked to this kid at the gym between sets instead of looking at my phone. Turns out he had a big sister and as a result, when she dropped by I was already partially "verified" in her network. I wasn't friendly with him because of that, I didn't even know he had siblings. You don't expect things to pan out most of the time, you just increase your chances with every next person that likes and recognizes you.

The rare man who's good at cold approach in this day and age seems to be more into one night stands than a real relationship. If it happens then great, but I don't think it's realistic.

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▲ 8 ▼
– Grant_us_eyes 8 points 1 year ago +8 / -0

Pretty much, yes, I agree. 'You have to know women to meet women' is, while frustrating, a sad fact of life when it comes to dating and social circles.

It's just, I've never made the connection of 'Hey, maybe men getting married has an add-on effect of organically introducing women into their social circles, and men not getting married has cascading effects larger than we realize'.

Sort of like a social entropic cascade kind of deal.

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▲ 6 ▼
– The_Shadow_of_Intent 6 points 1 year ago +6 / -0

Well that's not totally what I said, meeting more dudes will eventually lead you to more women too unless you're exclusively making friends at Magic the Gathering tournaments. I agree that making friends with women is more efficient though. Lol

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▲ 2 ▼
– Grant_us_eyes 2 points 1 year ago +2 / -0

Hah! I'm just biased from my experience - among all the friends I've had, the number of single women I've met through them is, well... zero. So it goes.

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... continue reading thread?
▲ 6 ▼
– Gizortnik 6 points 1 year ago +6 / -0

You're right, tbh. But that's because you're not looking in the right places. Especially if you are older.

It's crazy how Gen X will say shit like, they can meet people on the subway or in a grocery store.

Firstly, no one's going to speak with you, certainly not romantically, in those environments.

Secondly, the people you are actually going to encounter are all basically taken and in relationships if they are normal.

Third, the people who aren't already in a relationship, are kind of broken single women in their 30's, and you don't really feel interested in them anyway because they are repulsive people generally and would treat you like shit, at best.

Fourth, those same women in their thirties are still trying to get laid at bars, which proves you probably shouldn't start a relationship with them.

I'm not really sure what else to do except widen your social circle and hope someone introduces you to a friend of theirs. That seems to be the only legitimate way forward with the most reasonable risk.

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▲ 7 ▼
– current_horror 7 points 1 year ago +7 / -0

The real secret to finding a decent woman in 2023: look for introverts with skinny moms. That’s the whole game at this point. You want someone with non-fat genetics who doesn’t thrive on social validation. And if you have to sacrifice the former for the latter, so be it.

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▲ 4 ▼
– TheOpiner 4 points 1 year ago +4 / -0

The single women I know of are either voluntary celibate or waiting for perfection (or at least better than all the positive aspect of their exes - a.k.a. "alpha widow") and nothing less.

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▲ 2 ▼
– normaluser15 2 points 1 year ago +2 / -0

Single women on the ground nowadays is very fucking sparse, and seemingly impossible to come across organically. For me, atleast.

White women under 40 are very sparse.

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