Weirdly, perhaps, for a lonely internet shut-in, I've always wanted a big family...
Like, it has long been my biggest dream is life to have a family approaching this size...
Maybe it comes from the fact that I was a very lonely, sad only child, who desperately wanted a sibling, and whose parents... Well let's just say it's harder to take a kid's sibling away, if I had any, than to prevent him from ever seeing his friends again. In theory, anyway...
So... Yeah. I know it very likely will never happen (I'm not gay, I just... Don't see myself meeting someone who wants that with me. Or living that long...), but... It makes me kind of sad that this most natural of urges; this most... Basic of things... Essentially your "biological imperative" as an animal (further than that, as a living being, seeing as this "need to reproduce" applies to plants and fucking bacteria, too)... Has become something that is seen as a negative, a bad thing, at least if you are a straight, white millennial... :-(
Brb, moving to... Eastern Europe somewhere, or the Philippines...
I joke, and I hope it doesn't come to that, but jesus I wish there were more women like this out there, somewhere I can... Actually find/meet one. :-/
I met my husband at 33 and we're about to have 3 kids in 4 years. Don't give up. We met at a concert for an obscure musician. The dating "scene" is garbage, you'll only find trash, so find ways to add a social element to your hobbies. -from one only child to another
It's important to focus on self (not being selfish, but self improvement). Develop hobbies, pursue interests, and things will naturally fall into place via simply fulfilling goals in life.
Hey thanks. <3 Genuinely appreciate this, and it made me feel a bit better to read it, haha...
I guess the thing is... In Australia right now, concerts are... Almost exceptionally rare. Anything like that is. Not because we don't have the talent, or the resources, but because... We're not really allowed to do anything "normal", and governments keep shifting the goalposts on when we might be able to, again...
So not that it's any real excuse, but... Any time I go to "plan" for anything great (like that concert you mention), the stupid fucks declare another "outbreak" of like, six cases, and I end up spending EVEN MORE time stuck in my fucking house, rueing lost chances...
I know this (hopefully) won't always be like this, and I do remain hopeful, but... It's so hard.
Especially when my home city just turned one of its best pubs into a homeless shelter (I am not kidding), and another of my favourite pubs, which hosted a gig only the night before, was burned down due to one of its other... Long-term (i.e. homeless) residents out the back stubbing his fucking cigarette out on the hotel room bed... :-/
So it's just... Yeah, not been a great time, to meet people at gigs, down here, I'm afraid, and those things make it worse, ha. But I do remain hopeful, so thanks, again.
You're welcome. The subject is dear to my heart, because of course I went through a lifetime of being the odd one out, with no one to share enthusiasm in my interests. Then by most men's standards, me being single still at 33 meant I was all dried out and no good to anyone. Might as well give up and join a convent. Yet here I am with my husband and a third child on the way.
Disappointment and loneliness really weigh on you. I'll tell you what helped even more than the concert. A few weeks beforehand, I was really down on myself for being single at 33. I thought it was too late for me and maybe I was destined for a solo life. So I prayed to God (which was new for me at the time) and said "God, I really want to be a wife and mother for someone but if that is not in your plans for me than I accept that". I gave up this dream to Him, and vowed to try to accept my situation.
Then I realized that if I was going to be single, I was going to be my own boyfriend. So I adopted a mentality of being loving and caring to myself. "DrinkCovfefe, what would you like to do this weekend?" I would say, then do the things that made me happy without feeling guilty or silly, like I should be doing something else, being more productive or trying to make myself and my home "better".
That's what led me to the concert, I was taking myself out for a night on the town. And I was having a great time by myself, as we only children can do, being good at entertaining ourselves. So it was really the mentality of caring for myself as I normally would do for a partner, that brought me out and put the smile on my face that attracted my husband.
It must be hard with everything closed down, and having your favorite pub turn into a homeless shelter really sucks. But you know when someone is comfortable with themselves, it shows, and people flock to you. Who knows, maybe you will be stuck in line somewhere and a cute girl will stand behind you wearing a shirt from that obscure thing you like. Don't give into the gloom, my friend!
Weirdly, perhaps, for a lonely internet shut-in, I've always wanted a big family...
Like, it has long been my biggest dream is life to have a family approaching this size...
Maybe it comes from the fact that I was a very lonely, sad only child, who desperately wanted a sibling, and whose parents... Well let's just say it's harder to take a kid's sibling away, if I had any, than to prevent him from ever seeing his friends again. In theory, anyway...
So... Yeah. I know it very likely will never happen (I'm not gay, I just... Don't see myself meeting someone who wants that with me. Or living that long...), but... It makes me kind of sad that this most natural of urges; this most... Basic of things... Essentially your "biological imperative" as an animal (further than that, as a living being, seeing as this "need to reproduce" applies to plants and fucking bacteria, too)... Has become something that is seen as a negative, a bad thing, at least if you are a straight, white millennial... :-(
Brb, moving to... Eastern Europe somewhere, or the Philippines...
I joke, and I hope it doesn't come to that, but jesus I wish there were more women like this out there, somewhere I can... Actually find/meet one. :-/
I met my husband at 33 and we're about to have 3 kids in 4 years. Don't give up. We met at a concert for an obscure musician. The dating "scene" is garbage, you'll only find trash, so find ways to add a social element to your hobbies. -from one only child to another
Yep, that's good advice.
It's important to focus on self (not being selfish, but self improvement). Develop hobbies, pursue interests, and things will naturally fall into place via simply fulfilling goals in life.
Hey thanks. <3 Genuinely appreciate this, and it made me feel a bit better to read it, haha...
I guess the thing is... In Australia right now, concerts are... Almost exceptionally rare. Anything like that is. Not because we don't have the talent, or the resources, but because... We're not really allowed to do anything "normal", and governments keep shifting the goalposts on when we might be able to, again...
So not that it's any real excuse, but... Any time I go to "plan" for anything great (like that concert you mention), the stupid fucks declare another "outbreak" of like, six cases, and I end up spending EVEN MORE time stuck in my fucking house, rueing lost chances...
I know this (hopefully) won't always be like this, and I do remain hopeful, but... It's so hard.
Especially when my home city just turned one of its best pubs into a homeless shelter (I am not kidding), and another of my favourite pubs, which hosted a gig only the night before, was burned down due to one of its other... Long-term (i.e. homeless) residents out the back stubbing his fucking cigarette out on the hotel room bed... :-/
So it's just... Yeah, not been a great time, to meet people at gigs, down here, I'm afraid, and those things make it worse, ha. But I do remain hopeful, so thanks, again.
Only child high five, haha.
You're welcome. The subject is dear to my heart, because of course I went through a lifetime of being the odd one out, with no one to share enthusiasm in my interests. Then by most men's standards, me being single still at 33 meant I was all dried out and no good to anyone. Might as well give up and join a convent. Yet here I am with my husband and a third child on the way.
Disappointment and loneliness really weigh on you. I'll tell you what helped even more than the concert. A few weeks beforehand, I was really down on myself for being single at 33. I thought it was too late for me and maybe I was destined for a solo life. So I prayed to God (which was new for me at the time) and said "God, I really want to be a wife and mother for someone but if that is not in your plans for me than I accept that". I gave up this dream to Him, and vowed to try to accept my situation.
Then I realized that if I was going to be single, I was going to be my own boyfriend. So I adopted a mentality of being loving and caring to myself. "DrinkCovfefe, what would you like to do this weekend?" I would say, then do the things that made me happy without feeling guilty or silly, like I should be doing something else, being more productive or trying to make myself and my home "better".
That's what led me to the concert, I was taking myself out for a night on the town. And I was having a great time by myself, as we only children can do, being good at entertaining ourselves. So it was really the mentality of caring for myself as I normally would do for a partner, that brought me out and put the smile on my face that attracted my husband.
It must be hard with everything closed down, and having your favorite pub turn into a homeless shelter really sucks. But you know when someone is comfortable with themselves, it shows, and people flock to you. Who knows, maybe you will be stuck in line somewhere and a cute girl will stand behind you wearing a shirt from that obscure thing you like. Don't give into the gloom, my friend!