Hey!
Many of you old timers know I talk a ton of bullshit. Now my bullshit is getting turned into a novel or something similar.
Nowhere near done yet, nowhere near great yet. It's fantasy.
Would any of ye people be interested in maybe looking at some chapters soon?
I would prefer if you were regular posters/known around here. Not because I have an issue with fresh meat, but I would hate if some pantifa plants tried messing with my thing.
(Mods, delete if inappropriate post.)
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I don't have much rules for plot outside of not putting in leftist, and dare I say, liberal bullshit.
Other than that, I don't know what you're asking for. Writing as a realm has been filled with regressives for decades, though funny enough the readers are a bit more of a mixed bag.
Just the most barebones thing of if people think I'm going at it completely wrong as opposed to really unpolished and unedited and unfinished, but acceptable for now.
To see if my basic idea for the whole thing lands.
If you want a nitpicky psychopath who gets unreasonably judgemental about cliches and dialogue, I'd love to help.
Perhaps it would motivate me to stop deleting every page I write in an angry rage at how it turns out. By my poorly upkept metric I'm at over 4000 pages and counting over the last decade.
HOLY SHIT, that is wild. You wrote almost half a Malazan.
The whole story is based on one of the biggest clichés ever (the chosen one), but it fucks it up real bad.
What was once a shitty Naruto fanfiction (it was 2007, it was what we weebs did) has long since shed almost anything to do with that setting and sprawled into 5 book minimum epic. I have the entire outline done, its the individual pages I keep getting disappointed with and scrapping.
And nothing is original anymore because everything has been done, so cliches are a necessity. But unironic direct playing of them is generally the issue. Long "explaining the world to someone who already knows it" chapters, things like that.
Not gonna lie, I am grinning now. I used to be obsessed with Naruto, you don't have to explain that to me. (Kakashi is best husbando, FITE ME).
You can have him. I was a Hinata simp back when Kishimoto himself still considered her a funny side character with Sakura the real love interest.
Its quite hilarious how much he had to swallow his pride when after years he realized he fucked up so badly that not only did no one like his female lead, he had to pretend he totally always meant Hinata would win.
But my own work has strayed so far from its origins that the only connection is a few side characters in the flashbacks vaguely resemble a few from Naruto itself.
If anything, one thing I really liked about endless shounen was the wide variety of side characters. I'm not against fanfiction as an institution, especially when so many cool characters just get underused and treated like crowd.
Bleach is the same in that sense and that made me even more salty about the final couples.
I really didn't like the final pairs in Bleach either.
Ichigo and Rukia had so much better chemistry than Ichigo and Orihime.
AMEN. Ichigo sometimes had these huge phases of depression (understandable) and the way Rukia treated him seemed to work much better than just being UWU cutesy.
I'm also super against doing the emotional shotcut for a sequel, aka just going the "these are the kids of the previous characters you got to like during a million episodes".
It also makes sure everybody finds a favorite somewhere in the cast, and you just have to hope your character gets screentime in the future instead of being sidelined (my boy Shino got shafted).
A Shino fan?
I am truly sorry for what you had to endure.
As a Neji fan, I can understand your pain.
What exactly are you looking for in terms of feedback? Edits, opinions on the world/plot, etc?
Also, keep in mind, say what you will about the woke, they are VERY proactive in getting what they want. The same can’t always be said about the opposite crowd, so your feedback could be limited.
Honestly, I would be 100% fine with just "start again from scratch" or "worth editing this one". Plus, I am going for a very... specific thing with the protagonist. I would like to know if it's working or not.
Yeah, I know it's not exactly easy. I actually have ties to an author of some renown, he said he would look at my stuff and share with some of the people he knows who are alpha/beta readers, but I would like something more easy-going before I let an actual person on the shelves/semi regularly mentioned in literary circles probably demolish my ass.
So nothing professional.
Hahaha, sure. I’ve got some writing education, so I know the feeling (wanted to write some kind of story before this madness took hold). Just know that you will always write some form of garbage in your first draft.
Don’t beat yourself up over criticism, but DO look your work over again and again. Polishing the rough parts helps it shine ;)
Yeah, thanks. I will work on this for a bit longer (I want to introduce my female lady woman character and figure some things out), then hit you up if that's cool.
Oh, I know that. I really do. I'm usually pretty hard in myself because if it is said already, then it can't hurt you.
I think the basic idea is pretty fun and has potential, I just have to work it out. Funny enough, there are already some plotholes and previously not properly figured out things I worked out while writing the first few chapters.
The idea is based around one of the most overdone things; the chosen one. The very very barebones story is this:
We have a dude, growing up in a village where he is allowed to do whatever he wants and be an absolute snooty brat because they know he is the next Chosen One. People have to put up with his shit because of that. Of course he has this twisted sense of self.
He is asked to go, and take the powers he is meant to have. Along the way he gets some companions, believes they are his servants. As it is customary, he starts becoming a better person through their adventures and such.
Once they reach their destination, it turns out there are no chosen ones in the sense that no magical power picks them. The community knows they need one, but of course they don't want to risk the safety of their own kids, so they take one family that's easier to influence and bully/bribe them into offering their kid. The kid's characteristics don't matter.
His "servants" are much stronger than him and they were there to keep him in line if he figured shit out and was to snap.
The very end is malleable yet, but this is the main idea I want to work with.
He sometimes admits he has no clue what's going on (to himself, not to anyone, the ego monster), but he is good at silencing the inner voices telling him something is off.
He looks forward to it in a petty way. Like "huh, I will show it to everyone, anyone who was ever not 100% into me will fucking see now". When he is made to go and actually do it he panics a bit.
All in all, he explains everything with "but the universe does this, it knows best". He even thinks he has plot armor and because of that does these reckless, ridiculous things, like trying to charm bad guys with speaking to them and assuming they will "see the light". Which inevitably ends with his companions having to save his ass with pure violence.
It starts out "funny", as in you just have to look at this retard blundering around and everyone being baffled by why he is such a moron. Then I plan on it getting serious and traumatic for him when he realises that people just played along because of their own benefits and the outsiders he met probably assumed he was most likely kicked in the head by a horse as a kid or something.
Oh, it's okay, I like sperging about this. Plus, working on it does help me figure things out.
What he is supposed to get is this mantle of protecting the people from supernatural dangers. Goes around in his area, hunts down creatures and smaller magic-users who are up to no good. It's a ton of work and makes the person very isolated. You live a bit longer, maybe like 200 or so years, but it's hard work.
He thinks he only needs super basic, easy, joke "training" because he was born perfect. The truth is, you get parts of the consciousness and memories of the previous people who did this, which makes them... kind of jaded, but they understand the weight of their duty. So it really changes your personality and just shows how little you as a person matter as opposed to the mantle. (Learning this will fuck him up so bad.)
The village doesn't really tell him much, they just let this idiot imagine it being mega cool and nobody corrects him. They treat him like the kid you are not supposed to fight with because "he has an illness".
His parents are okay. They are not bad people, but not very involved with him because they feel guilty. I think they know they are assholes for allowing this whole mess, but they were not important/rich/powerful enough to say no, so they just took the benefits and tried not to get too attached to block the guilt.
I’ve got a lot of writing background, though not as a novelist. But I’d be happy to take a look at what you’ve got and provide feedback.
Thank you! I will work a bit longer, then hit you up.
This is actually a great step for you, writing can be a VERY daunting task, a lot of people who try writing give up due to fear of criticism, so I think it's great that you want some feedback.
Now, english is not my first language, but I do read ALL of my books in english, so I might be able to help out a bit, specially if you are writing fantasy!
In any case good luck to you, and just WRITE, even if It doesn't turn out great at first, as long as you keep writing you can improve!
I'm not a native speaker either, which only adds to Mission Impossible.
Can we form our own community inside video games?
For example. I like Elite Dangerous. They have little factions that can own planets and participate in running missions and acting as a community.
I can imagine a situation where we can just own a planet and be our own little faction in the galaxy. I don't know that we have enough Elite Dangerous players to that precisely, but I like the idea.
Eve Online is probably too much work at this point. We'd be better off having everyone move to a specific town and taking over the local government through mass shitlord migration.
I'm willing to explore the idea, but I'm just not familiar with how specific factions work.
Recently got into ED, it's like a nice rural small-town eve online. From player stats it looks like it's still on the ascendant too.
I wouldn't mind a player group that isn't explicitly shitlords only, but run by a core that I can trust knows what's up and how to remove entryists and troublemakers.
That's two. I don't know how many we need to actually pull this off. I'm going to buy a flight stick to learn how to do manual controls. I don't know why I like docking so much.
Hey, another aspiring writer! I'd be happy to help, if I can. Though to be perfectly honest, I may or may not be particularly helpful depending on what it is you're writing & what I'll be looking at - I'm the kind of guy who tends to write 20-30,000+ words of worldbuilding without even (and sometimes ever, although I am trying to discipline & push myself in that regard) starting a single narrative chapter.
Now that I think about it, having some kind of Creative.win somewhere down the road to be able to share writing, art, etc. without having to worry about getting brigaded by leftist mobs would be nice.
The opposite is true for me. With this specific one the world building is not very important in the sense that the whole point is how the protagonist doesn't understand half of it and even that gets flipped on him.
Dude, that would be amazing. They would try, they always do, but they can't help blowing their load fast.
Well, that's alright. Although I'm definitely more into the world-building side, I'm not a total stranger to writing narrative prose - I'm still down to help if you'd like, particularly with dialogue/phrasing/grammar.
And yeah, it's probably unavoidable since TD.win is constantly bombarded with leftist trolls no matter how quickly their moderators work to remove the former, but I've noticed that shill/troll infestations only really start becoming a problem if the mods are compromised somehow and allow them to fester.
As long as they get removed promptly and bashed by all the serious posters in the interim, they're not much of a problem, and whatever issues their presence would cause is easily outweighed by the benefits of a Reddit-esque site where we can post work that isn't riddled with forced diversity or portrays right-associated characters & arguments in any non-negative light and not get relentlessly hounded by cries of 'fascist!'.
Is it going to be a novel or web serial? If it's a serial we can judge by chapter.
Everything can be bad in different ways.
Have you met kalebprime? He's also writing something. https://www.ckaleb.com/
I'm about 35 pages in so far, I need to work on it a bit more. Time doesn't matter much, this will be a years long project, if anything.
As a creative type myself, I'd love to read what you've got going!
Nice, thanks! I'm surprised how many of us around here do things like that.
I don't do it as much as I wish I did, but I've got so many ideas for games, comics, books, etc bouncing around in my head to varying degrees of completion, with notes and art and concepts, etc scattered around. The hard part is actually sitting down and getting the ideas solidified on paper. It's easy to think "Man, this'd be cool!" or "This would be a fun character to tell a story about!" or "Wouldn't this be a fun kind of game?" It's a lot harder to actually work out all the nitty gritty that goes into actually producing something.
You bounce your ideas off me, I bounce my ideas off you, and we'll see if we can't actually make worthwhile things, eh?
Sounds awesome! Do you have discord or some such?
Send it, would be nice to see work made by someone who doesn't care about woke bullshit
Oh, this will probably be very badly. :D
I'll bite. Tell me what you've got and I'll tell you when my book is done.
Sure, I can proofread a few chapters if you like. No experience of narrative writing but plenty of experience reading fiction and proofing docs for errors. Plus, I like to think I can occasionally pull together a good turn of phrase, so hopefully that translates into a decent sense of which writing is more engaging than the others.
Careful what you wish for though. I imagine having a team of would-be editors all individually critiquing/error-correcting the same piece of text would be an actual nightmare to process. Maybe chop it up into a number of smaller samples handed out individually to only one or two at a time? That might help mitigate the inherent flakiness of internet volunteers a bit too. If you like one person's input a lot you can always ask real nicely if they'd do a second pass on the other chunks later.