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be me

landlord in LA

rent house in the hills to 25yo CFO of a “real estate company”

arrives in lime-green Bentley w/ influencer "gf" + emotional support micro-poodle

stops paying rent

emails me a PDF from the county website saying “COVID-related income loss”

nothing I can do, because LA = anarchy

nonstop Eyes Wide Shut parties at my house

dog melts my hardwood floors w/ atomic diarrhea

claims poverty on paper while bottle-servicing magnums of Ace in my pool

private jets to Paris, Tulum, Miami, Vegas

"gf" showered w/ diamonds, birkin bags, red carpets, "chopper to 'chella"

everything posted on instagram, lest there be any doubt

eventually moves out, I celebrate prematurely

sues me for 8figs the next morning, just to f with me

2y legal war

vanishes

today: DOJ indicts him for stealing $130M from California’s homeless fund

may justice be served.