Because if caring about my race above other races makes me racist then I’m racist. Once whites in general are ok saying “I’m racist” all sorts of terrifying ideas end up on the table.
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People aren't as afraid of it as you may think.
The problem is there are consequences to being it, serious and life ruining ones. Like, we can not care all we want, but Karen in HR does and she will make sure you are jobless if you upset her little progressive feefees. And most Americans are not in a place to just get fired and not suffer heavily.
As long as these consequences exist, people will hide thier power level out of survival, often long enough that it effects their thinking itself.
You can either remove these consequences, by making "wrong think" protected speech until people feel comfortable speaking their minds again, or keep throwing bodies at them until the anger boils over. Which will eventually happen, but the amount of bodies is likely horrifying.