Because if caring about my race above other races makes me racist then I’m racist. Once whites in general are ok saying “I’m racist” all sorts of terrifying ideas end up on the table.
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The problem is racism is stupid because you assume the random person you've never met gives a shit about whether you live or die because you allegedly have some number of ancestors within the same continent. "Communities" are not vague, intertemporal, large, abstract populations. Communities are people you can actually meet, talk to, engage with, share culture and values with, have expectations with, and are something you've already integrated into with your efforts at socialization. In communities, people care about you because they are at least a passing friend who knows who you are, and you know them.
The only people who care about you are your family and friends, if anyone at all. The rest is just people hoping bigotry can ease cognitive load, and a Race Communists looking to kill you and steal your wallet.
Even if you believe in civic nationalism, by all means you have to recognize grievance politics are incompatible with it
Correct. Not only is it incompatible, but assimilation and integration is mandatory, and those who can't assimilate must be forcibly excised.
Did I stutter?
The issue is that we have different concepts of who can and can't assimilate. This is because assimilation is a choice that people have to make. Some people come to the US to escape and abandon where they came form in order to come from us, and that's absolutely doable. Mass migration just means that those people basically never get here, because they're trying to escape the people we're importing.