Hey.
So, as I have discussed it with some of you here, our almonds have been activated, but even weaponised autism bodies need the fuel.
All jokes aside, inflation is crazy everywhere. Just ordering some stuff was viable some time ago, but it's getting less so. Plus, tasty food is good for your general well-being and making it so is not only a skill all adults should have in my opinion (you are strong, independent adults, learn life skills that make you depend less on everyone else), but it can also be fun.
As much as I would love to feed you all, that's obviously impossible. The next best thing is, I curate a little collection of recipes and break it down so you can make it with relatively simple ingredients that don't depend on specific brands and using from scratch stuff as much as it is viable. Making your own pasta and churning your own butter would be fun, but I work a full time jerb that's not ASMR whisper cooking on Tiktok in a peasant dress.
It's going to be a combination of food from all different kinds. Some Hungarian (none of the war crimes Americans call goulasch), some Asian, some inauthentic shit that will get you cancelled, some mains, pasta, soups, desserts.
So gather around, my friends and eat like kings.
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can anyone join in on the recipe submission? If so, i'd like to submit my jerky burger recipe (it's a flexible recipe, so most ingredients are "to taste"):
1 LB ground beef
low sodium soy sauce or Worcestershire sauce
brown sugar
Black pepper (or white if you want it extra spicy) (optional)shredded or cubed cheddar cheese (it really doesn't matter which, ive used either without issue)
Warning: we're breaking some normal burger making rules here, so be aware.
toss the ground beef in a stand mixer with the paddle mixer or food processor (i suspect the mixer will work better, but I don't have a food processor) and let it run while you add +/- a quarter cup of sauce, brown sugar to taste (only need a little bit for smokiness, it shouldn't be sweet. i usually eyeball everything, but about a tablespoon, tablespoon and a half should be plenty), the cheese, and as much black pepper as you can stand, then let the mixer run for a few minutes to get everything mixed through, and to break up the connective tissue thoroughly.
once the meat looks good, divvy it up into four roughly even balls and either smash flat on parchment paper and freeze for at least two hours if you're grilling them (or longer if you're prepping ahead), or move on to the next step for frying.
Frying
heat up your skillet until it starts to smoke, then drop one of your meatballs directly into the pan and smash it flat (use some sort of weight on top of the spatula if you need to), then let it cook until it's, ideally, cooked most of the way through, then flip it over, do the same and transfer to the oven while you toast the bun in the beef fat, then put the burger on the bottom buns and add whatever you like on your burger.
Grilling
heat up the grill while you wait for the burgers to freeze and (optionally) put half an onion in the middle of the grill while you pretoast the buns. it shouldn't take more than half a minute (a minute and a half at most) on either side. set them to the side and leave the onion in the grill. retrieve your patties from the freezer and cut the parchment paper out around them. Put the patties parchment-side down on the grill and cover. check them periodically, but keep the lid on as much as possible, it'll help infuse the flavors of the onion and wood smoke if you're using them, and keep flareups to a minimum.
anyway, once the patties are well cooked, flip them over and use tongs or whatever's handy to remove the parchment paper and discard. same process for the second side, then transfer to your prepared buns.
You shouldn't need any condiments for these, but you can certainly add them to taste.
side note: I can't speak to any other wood, but my kind white oak trees constantly donate wood for our culinary needs quite regularly, and i've yet to buy charcoal since i've moved into this house, and it works fantastically, lol.