Some of you will have seen the post the other day. Apparently I made a girl “uncomfortable” via a text exchange (I assure you, there was nothing untoward on my part).
I pressed the University for details, and now I am told I am being formally investigated. They’ve formally accused me of misconduct, now, and told me that I must speak to them over the phone, this week…
For various reasons I won’t go into, I simply cannot do the phone thing, this week. I just can’t. I’ve told them so, and I’ve also told them that I will be seeking legal advice.
They linked me to a web page which essentially, very nebulously, outlines that anyone can make an allegation against a student, even anonymously, and it will be investigated, even if the situation in question has nothing to do with the University…
It even says “Anything can be sexual harassment, even if it only occurs once”. So I gather that is what I am up for…
Fuck me. This is so fucked…
if you are 100% wrong you didn't violate any rule, is there any value to fighting your school and escalating this?
I just don't know, because they won't tell me the specifics, even of the allegation...
I can't really know whether it is worth escalating when they won't even tell me what I'm accused of, apart from "misunderstanding which made a fellow student uncomfortable"...
That's all they will tell me. I'm not kidding. There's no firm evidence. Just that...
Absolutely speak to a lawyer. Here in the US you can pay for a consult, and sometimes get it for free. It may cost you a few hundred dollars but it's worth knowing your options if nothing else. The fact that they're telling you not to get a lawyer is a flashing red sign that you should absolutely get a lawyer.
Honestly the level of panic I see from you over what you swear is nothing is something that sets off lawyer alarm bells. If it is really nothing, why are you so very clearly freaking out and saying absurd things about your mental health and shit like you can't do a phone call next week when you so very clearly can?
Not attacking you, but you're acting sus.
My grandmother just died, among several other things. I have an enormous assignment due, that I haven’t had the opportunity to work on.
That is why I’m panicking. Not because I’m worried I’ll be “caught out”.
I’m far more worried I’ll miss a) the deadline, or b) my fucking grandmother’s funeral, in another state, a six hour flight away…
Edit: I basically watched my grandmother die, a few days ago, after myself being extremely ill, to the point of being in hospital, the 48 hours prior.
I was edgy before the allegations. Hence the inability to “manage” it calmly right now…
The University knows those things happened, and yet they, at the apparent insistence of my accuser, are still pressing on this week. Hence my “hysteria”, if you want to call it that…
you should tell the school those issues
Dude come on this is an official sanction from a bunch of libs. You know what can happen. You're the one acting sus.
I think it was a more polite way of saying “You’re being a whiny bitch. Stop it.”
And I guess I kind of am..?
I’m just extremely stressed, and to be told that I have to fight this now, when I was already having one of the worst weeks of my life, so… Eh.
But anyway, thanks mate. I appreciate the backup!
Because I already have a lot of other shit going on in my life.
Not because of the allegation, but because I literally don’t have time to deal with it right now.
It’s cumulative.