The only time redditors believe in privacy is when it can be used to brainwash/groom/molest kids
(media.communities.win)
You're viewing a single comment thread. View all comments, or full comment thread.
Comments (52)
sorted by:
From my own experiences growing up, I'm of a mixed mind on this. I'm a firm believer that over coddling your children and protecting them from making mistakes can very much hurt them in the long run. And encouraging an environment of distrust only creates further rifts and conflict.
Now there are absolutely exceptions to this, when the consequences of those mistakes are almost certainly going to have permanent ramifications, or when they are clearly forming going to form a pattern of mistakes where they have no intention to learn from them and make smarter decisions.
However not allowing them to experiment or push boundaries even a little risks even less mutual trust, less honest and open communication, resentment, cowardice and aversion to solid risk taking, and can lead to an even more rebellious and strained relationship.
Furthermore, you're there to guide them so they can become their own person as they grow up and become an healthy and well rounded adult. It's a foolish and a rather selfish expectation to try and form them up into what YOU want them to be. This goes for parents and it goes for other outside influences, including the government.
If there's anything you should try to emphasize or try to instill in them, it's the core set of necessary values and tools they need so that they can grow up to become independent, intelligent, well rounded individuals who are capable of thinking for themselves and making their own choices.
Same. Like, my privacy was respected very little and it made me incredibly resentful. It didn't improve my behavior, it just made me take it outside the home in more crafty and riskier places. And I wasn't even involved in actual bad shit like drugs or sex, just straight up wanting to be alone and given quiet.
I can absolutely see the mindset here of not letting them be unmonitored to prevent all the evils of social media, but extreme measures always just make things worse and it should be handled with the proper nuance between the family in question.
But then again, the type of parent who needs to viciously watch their child to keep them from these traps likely already failed to begin with by making them susceptible to it and is trying to dodge responsibility by blaming others. The classic histrionic mom blaming the school instead of her behavior for her child acting up.
Aye, I think we're definitely on the same page. It took me a long, long time to even start to get over some of the negative effects from some of my own parents' mistakes. And generally, I'll admit, they weren't actually that bad. They just fouled up in a few areas, and we could never come to terms over some notable points of disagreement and friction that just got worse and worse as time went on.
What it mostly boiled down to though was a lack of trust, which ended up going both ways. And their failure to acknowledge or listen to what I had to say. (Man, did I open up more there than I originally intended to)
Was also going to add to your last point, where there definitely are special cases where things have just gone awry, almost to the point of not being salvageable. Sometimes it's due to some mistakes the parent(s) made, sometimes the kid got too far off track, and other times it's just a matter of bad luck, like if a kid has some challenges that can't really be overcome, no matter how hard everyone tries.
Yeah, we are coming from much the same area. Though, given my household was a junkie den I'll still stand on they were pretty bad.
The irony being that they recognized that fact, and much of the stomping on privacy (and many other issues) was an attempt to appear like a good parent doing their duty. A virtue signal trying to mask prior failures.
For sure. Sometimes things just don't work out, but putting in solid push and pull effort to build and maintain a relationship with your kid will do infinitely more to prevent the bad ends than any form of keylogging, privacy invasion.
Aye, totally. It's curious how, even though the measure of your and my own parents' character might've been different, the mistakes they make and their reasoning still ends up being so similar. The same follies, the same kind of faulty logic. Mixed with some self awareness, but they end up lacking the courage to seriously confront or fully acknowledge their failings. "To err is human" maybe?
I've seen opinions pushing the idea that a lot of the cringe "wokeness" is due to parents overindulging their kids or not being stern enough, I've felt that a lot of it was probably more due to the exact opposite. Where parents kept pushing their kids further and further away, right into the clutches of those with a far more nefarious and insidious agenda.
I think it's of little surprise that this happens so frequently in college, especially. Kids end up finally getting some space and freedom from their parents, which in of itself is usually a good opportunity for them to learn independence and to think for themselves. But instead some end up getting cajoled and coaxed, little by little, into a new cult-like way of looking at the world.
Sorry if I'm a little all over the place at this point. Been juggling multiple conversations on here and elsewhere all night so my brain might be a bit zapped out.
What you're describing is more of letting them go outside to play and getting their knee scraped or even going out with their friends to a party.
This isn't overcoddling, this is protecting them from sick individuals. If you read the original thread, there's plenty of people sharing anecdotes that every parent fears.
Also, it's only "distrust" when they've already been brainwashed/groomed because, if they haven't, they would realize you're protecting them. As an adult, you're wiser than them and can pick up on red flags that would seem innocent and harmless to them.
Again, I recommend reading the thread. Also, read the comments from people who disagree - they don't want you knowing what your children are doing. Many of them point to 13-14 as the age you should "respect their privacy." If you go on the tranny subreddits, there's quite a few 13-17yr olds on there talking to sick individuals and some of those individuals are offering them HRT. That's just one example of what could be going on at that age.
I am very much aware of the present concerns and horrifying circumstances surrounding them. And I'm certainly not unaware of some rather close-call situations from people I know personally, and this is from years ago, and I'd have to be a fool to not expect things to be even worse today.
I was mostly saying that to go too far in one extreme in order to protect your kids against a clearly pervasive and dangerous influence such as today's gender-groomer culture may not always be the best answer.
Certainly special measures do need to be considered because of just how hostile and aggressively bold their actions are getting. But to be most effective you and your kid(s) need to be on the same side and work together, and thus you do not want to unnecessarily treat your kids like they're the enemy. They can be your single and best informants on what's going on, and you can use that information to help safeguard them from these growing threats. But that's only ever going to happen if they feel they can trust you.
That said, sometimes stricter measures might need to be employed. All I'm saying is that you probably shouldn't leap to draconian measures against your own kids. Discreet and fair measures, absolutely, and also be extra cautious with how freely you give that trust to anyone else when it comes to your child's well being. That especially includes the state, media, schools, and medical industries.
Remember who the threat really is.
I agree that there's a balance to the struck. I think what makes it hard is that whether to monitor your child's electronics is a binary decision: You either do it or you don't. It's impossible to grant them some measure of privacy and protect them from troomers.
I absolutely agree, especially in today's clownworld I would have a VERY difficult time grappling with this. Though I still think the best chance a parent has is to keep those lines of communication open and honest, with a reasonably light but fair measure of feedback.
Far easier said than done, and I think it's safe to say that some leftist parents have gone to the point of being way too permissive.
Also, to add, that sometimes, as a parent, you do have to eventually throw in the towel and acknowledge that maybe you've done everything you can. And then you have to reassess and decide how to play things out. Maybe letting the kid sink or swim on their own. Situations vary, as do how things can play out.
Not that I'm a parent myself, but they're some questions I've given some thought over the years.