For me it's Caves of Qud. I love roguelikes and games with impenetrable control schemes and UIs. Took me a long long time to get the hang of Dwarf Fortress, but once I did I fell in love. But of course, I was younger then, and had much more time available.
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Morrowind, Oblivion, and Crusader Kings. Those are the style of games that are right up my alley.
For Morrowind you might want to look up what each stat does, if you invest your points badly you will have an annoying time with combat.
For Oblivion the level scaling is pretty weird. If you invest your points badly in that you can end up with enemies being way tougher than they should be. I would suggest turning down the difficulty in the options if there's some stuff you really can't get past.
Also check out Kingdom Come Deliverance if you haven't!
I am going thru Nehrim right now and I forgot how annoying leveling up your stats was in Oblivion. As for Morrowind, I've played that ages ago and I remember loving it but the only things I actually remember is starting over and over again for some reason, having a strat to get Umbra sword early on (which involved a levitation buff that lasted almost forever and joining the mage guild to get all the mana potions and then kill Umbra while levitating from above)
If you want to play Oblivion you should also try Nehrim. Is a game made for Oblivion, it has a very good story + a different world entirely. Similar with Shadow of Enderal for Skyrim, they are made by sure ai.