Its also my high school sweetheart, and the exact nature of how we got together is so convoluted and relies on so many coincidences that if you made it into a Hallmark movie, people would say it is cheesy and unrealistic.
For me, the issue is that there is a lot of it that seems so intuitive that I cant explain how it works, because it would be like trying to explain air. They also feel like there needs to be certain things in the relationship that are usually the sort of things that come about from the corruption of the culture.
I have found the usual sticking point is related to sex. Because it has been so forced into the culture and corrupted that, to some people, if you dont get it on at least once a day, it means your relationship is in decay and will collapse. And when I tell them that for us, while sex is nice its not the end all, be all, and we can get plenty of emotional fulfillment by just touching and holding one another, they start treating us like we must have the fortitude of a Buddhist monk. Even though for most of history that was exactly the attitude of most husbands and wives. And then the issues seem to grow out from there, and leads to cascading issues down the line.
And of course, a lot of them do nothing on actually building a relationship, giving and taking with their partner to make both of you happy, and doing what you can to start a family to continue it onward. And so they are shocked when it all comes crashing down in months or a few years at best, because they confused lust with love.
And when I tell them that for us, while sex is nice its not the end all, be all, and we can get plenty of emotional fulfillment by just touching and holding one another, they start treating us like we must have the fortitude of a Buddhist monk.
I've heard these terms referred to as "love languages".
Yeah, the normies see this as temptation to sex, because they see sex as the achievement of emotional and physical intimacy... because they don't actually have regular physical intimacy.
It's worse because we know that men effectively don't get any emotional or physical intimacy outside of sex, but what's changed is that even women don't get physical intimacy outside of sex because men are conditioned to steer clear of physical intimacy with women.
So, any normal physical intimacy that you might have is just understood as "teasing" towards normies who are relegating all physical intimacy to sex 2-3 times a week if that's the case. What we're actually seeing is that millennial and Zoomers are the most sexless generations in American history, by really alarming numbers. Let me remind you what the regular, everyday, normal guy has for sexual performance.
The numbers of men who are virgins by 25, by 30, and even 35 are much higher than in recorded history. Millenials and Zoomers are reporting less sex both inside and outside of relationships. They are having less sex, less frequently, and they are in fewer relationships which would allow them to have a sexual outlet. The only good news is that America happens to be less worse off than the rest of the developed world. Japan is facing a demographic nightmare because I think 1/8 men by the age of 30 have never been on a date. In China, the situation is even worse.
It's like we stumbled into a sexual Dark Age. Actually, I'm going to use that from now on. When Rome receded, a lot of the knowledge of Rome was utterly lost, and quality of life dropped. Subjugated tribes basically receded back from the villas and into the hills to live how their ancestors had, and then it took a few hundred years for civilization to re-emerge and for those hill people to build their own kingdoms. People didn't even know what Romans looked like. They didn't know what bathhouses were. They didn't know what the names of abandoned cities were. They were stumbling blindly around the ruins of places they'd always lived near, but no one was left to tell them what they were looking at.
For us, something similar has happened. No one even knows how to build a relationship. The foundational premises aren't even there. They know they want love, but they don't know what that means, they don't know what it looks like, and they don't know how to get it. So it has to be rebuilt from the bottom up.
At least you guys are doing it. That's two down, just a few billion to go.
A lot of what you are writing is spoken about a lot by the christians who are still practicing. They aren't zealots, but Love is a central theme of the religion and it is preached in terms of obligation at all times.
Its also my high school sweetheart, and the exact nature of how we got together is so convoluted and relies on so many coincidences that if you made it into a Hallmark movie, people would say it is cheesy and unrealistic.
For me, the issue is that there is a lot of it that seems so intuitive that I cant explain how it works, because it would be like trying to explain air. They also feel like there needs to be certain things in the relationship that are usually the sort of things that come about from the corruption of the culture.
I have found the usual sticking point is related to sex. Because it has been so forced into the culture and corrupted that, to some people, if you dont get it on at least once a day, it means your relationship is in decay and will collapse. And when I tell them that for us, while sex is nice its not the end all, be all, and we can get plenty of emotional fulfillment by just touching and holding one another, they start treating us like we must have the fortitude of a Buddhist monk. Even though for most of history that was exactly the attitude of most husbands and wives. And then the issues seem to grow out from there, and leads to cascading issues down the line.
And of course, a lot of them do nothing on actually building a relationship, giving and taking with their partner to make both of you happy, and doing what you can to start a family to continue it onward. And so they are shocked when it all comes crashing down in months or a few years at best, because they confused lust with love.
I've heard these terms referred to as "love languages".
Yeah, the normies see this as temptation to sex, because they see sex as the achievement of emotional and physical intimacy... because they don't actually have regular physical intimacy.
It's worse because we know that men effectively don't get any emotional or physical intimacy outside of sex, but what's changed is that even women don't get physical intimacy outside of sex because men are conditioned to steer clear of physical intimacy with women.
So, any normal physical intimacy that you might have is just understood as "teasing" towards normies who are relegating all physical intimacy to sex 2-3 times a week if that's the case. What we're actually seeing is that millennial and Zoomers are the most sexless generations in American history, by really alarming numbers. Let me remind you what the regular, everyday, normal guy has for sexual performance.
The numbers of men who are virgins by 25, by 30, and even 35 are much higher than in recorded history. Millenials and Zoomers are reporting less sex both inside and outside of relationships. They are having less sex, less frequently, and they are in fewer relationships which would allow them to have a sexual outlet. The only good news is that America happens to be less worse off than the rest of the developed world. Japan is facing a demographic nightmare because I think 1/8 men by the age of 30 have never been on a date. In China, the situation is even worse.
It's like we stumbled into a sexual Dark Age. Actually, I'm going to use that from now on. When Rome receded, a lot of the knowledge of Rome was utterly lost, and quality of life dropped. Subjugated tribes basically receded back from the villas and into the hills to live how their ancestors had, and then it took a few hundred years for civilization to re-emerge and for those hill people to build their own kingdoms. People didn't even know what Romans looked like. They didn't know what bathhouses were. They didn't know what the names of abandoned cities were. They were stumbling blindly around the ruins of places they'd always lived near, but no one was left to tell them what they were looking at.
For us, something similar has happened. No one even knows how to build a relationship. The foundational premises aren't even there. They know they want love, but they don't know what that means, they don't know what it looks like, and they don't know how to get it. So it has to be rebuilt from the bottom up.
At least you guys are doing it. That's two down, just a few billion to go.
A lot of what you are writing is spoken about a lot by the christians who are still practicing. They aren't zealots, but Love is a central theme of the religion and it is preached in terms of obligation at all times.
I haven't seen "lot". I've seen "vanishingly few". Zealots or otherwise.