The "somebody watch him" was so I didn't get a bunch of people going "AND LEAVE THE CHILD ALONE!?!?!" when I brought up the concept of "door," which is why the sentence uses "and" instead of "or."

But yeah, I know not everyone can have somewhere with decent floor space and a locking door. Of course not every product needs to be for everyone and I'm sick of pretending it needs to be. If it was designed by and for people with no kids, that's completely fine.