Hey.
So, as I have discussed it with some of you here, our almonds have been activated, but even weaponised autism bodies need the fuel.
All jokes aside, inflation is crazy everywhere. Just ordering some stuff was viable some time ago, but it's getting less so. Plus, tasty food is good for your general well-being and making it so is not only a skill all adults should have in my opinion (you are strong, independent adults, learn life skills that make you depend less on everyone else), but it can also be fun.
As much as I would love to feed you all, that's obviously impossible. The next best thing is, I curate a little collection of recipes and break it down so you can make it with relatively simple ingredients that don't depend on specific brands and using from scratch stuff as much as it is viable. Making your own pasta and churning your own butter would be fun, but I work a full time jerb that's not ASMR whisper cooking on Tiktok in a peasant dress.
It's going to be a combination of food from all different kinds. Some Hungarian (none of the war crimes Americans call goulasch), some Asian, some inauthentic shit that will get you cancelled, some mains, pasta, soups, desserts.
So gather around, my friends and eat like kings.
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I've got one for you. It's a delicious one-pot pasta with bacon and spinach. It only has a couple of ingredients, prep time is minimal, and it's amazingly hearty. The measurements in this recipe make about 3-4 servings - it should be 4 but I always have seconds when it's fresh.
You'll need:
You don't need extra salt because the bacon and the broth are going to have plenty of it by themselves. You might want to add a bit of black pepper and/or fresh crushed garlic if you want, you can't go wrong with those. Garlic goes with everything. Put garlic on ice cream.
Also, the bacon to pasta ratio can of course be easily adjusted. Keep in mind that a lot of the raw bacon will be fat which will render out while cooking, so you'll end up with less than you started with.
Prep:
Cook:
Start with the bacon - dump it into the pot and fry it up. Depending on how fatty it is, you may or may not need to put in a bit of oil, or preferably tallow. (RFK Jr. stare)
Once it's sufficiently crispy - not completely carbonized but not too chewy anymore, take the pot off the heat and take the bacon out and set it aside for now. At the same time, remove most of the rendered fat, leave only about a tablespoon in. (Save the fat in a little jar and use it later to fry eggs, shit's cash.)
Put the pot with the little bit of fat left back on the heat and add the finely chopped onion, and fry it until it's translucent. The onion will be releasing moisture as it fries; use that to scrape the remaining bits of bacon off the bottom of the pot. If you're adding garlic, do it as well, but wait a few minutes for the onions to soften up first - garlic cooks much faster than onion, especially crushed (tiny bits, burns fast).
Once the onions are translucent, add the chicken broth. If you couldn't get all the bits of bacon off the bottom just with the onion, now's your second chance. When you're done doing that, add the raw, uncooked pasta, and stir it a bit so that everything is submerged. Bring it to a boil.
When it's boiling, give it a quick stir, turn the heat down to low, cover the pot with a lid, and let it simmer for 10 minutes. Give it a stir every couple of minutes so the pasta doesn't get stuck to the bottom, and replace the pot each time - you don't want it to reduce.
After 10 minutes, most of the broth should be absorbed into the pasta, with only a fairly thin layer of broth heavily thickened by the starch in the pasta remaining at the bottom of the pot. Give the pasta a taste - it should be nice and tender by now. If not, add about two minutes to the cooking time. Once you're satisfied with the broth and the pasta, add the spinach and mix it in.
Finally, add the bacon back in and mix it in as well.
Eat.
Regarding the parmesan: This depends on whether you'll be finishing the entire pot while it's fresh or if you want to save some for later in the fridge. If you're eating it now, grate a shitload of parmesan right into the pot and mix it in. If you want to reheat it later, I recommend giving each portion you're eating at the time a sprinkling of parmesan after you plate it up - it doesn't reheat so well if you mix the cheese into the broth, I find it ends up having this weird gummy texture. Your mileage may vary.
This bitch just posted a pasta recipe HE GOT FROM ME.
(I normally use frozen, finely chopped spinach because it melts and disperses evenly.)
No I didn't. Now shut up and post a recipe for a proper gulyás!