an unrealistic standard of perfect beauty is damaging
Don't give them the benefit of the doubt. Having ideals that you can never live up to is a good thing. "Feeling bad" about some fact of life isn't "damage" or "trauma" or "harm". Dealing with your feelings constructively is how normal humans should operate.
The focus seems to be on either being accepting of a woman’s obesity or a woman going overboard with their beauty standards.
Yes, an unrealistic standard of perfect beauty is damaging, but so is allowing one to become a land whale and thinking it’s healthy.
Focus on being legitimately healthy and people will see the beauty that being healthy brings.
Don't give them the benefit of the doubt. Having ideals that you can never live up to is a good thing. "Feeling bad" about some fact of life isn't "damage" or "trauma" or "harm". Dealing with your feelings constructively is how normal humans should operate.