If you are a guy and one of your friends is going through shit the second best thing you can do is not ask about it.

I think that might be a tad too far. Having a deep conversation with a friend, that helps them sort themselves out, and find a way of fixing what's wrong is very beneficial. Just talking for talking or de-stressing is a different issue. Your friend might actually want help, rather than just want you to listen to him bitch.