Do they roll these lards onto the scale? I've always had to consent to being weighed by walking onto the damn scale under my own power.

You can tell so much from a Twitter profile. Particularly when their name is "Monica | Fatty, MPH says "paid shutdown NOW, pls"." No one puts fatty there unless they are a fat activist. What the hell is an MPH? Massive Pig Hoe? Asking for a paid shutdown being the biggest one. Of course you want a paid shutdown, how better to sit on your lazy fat ass.