Any good fantasy legendarium will be racist and sexist, like biology itself.
DCSS' iterative distributed development evolved races, gods and backgrounds to occupy distinct niches in both gameplay and player imagination. The result is beautiful. Even those who have never played can appreciate the pictures associated with each racial archetype: HTML, Gitlab.
(I especially liked seeing Drizzt's panther summon come to life. My felid icon will forever be black.)
Whether it's the suicide bomber Orc religion of pieces or the hypnotic vampire synagogue of Satan, tru-DCSS speaks truth to power. No wonder the trans-revolutionaries had to ruin it.
If you're unfamiliar with DCSS, the best way to look up the table's jargon is to simply download v.23. The nu-DCSS wiki now reflects radically-revised versions of the game. (Looking at past versions of wiki pages requires navigating the version history.)
The Left has swept Western institutions, subverting even our video games. Join me at c/roguelikes to git gud and take back the culture. They can't stop us here, because it's open source. (((Blackrock))) ESG may control Github and Reddit, but it can't touch Scored.co and Gitgud.io
Stop playing woke video games, and start playing and developing based ones. Roguelikes teach patience, prudence and probability estimation – traits we will need in the coming turbulent decades. Ever since I beat Castle of the Winds as a child, I believed in the heroic journey. The games we build will shape our childrens' souls.
For further discussion, continue reading here.
I've compiled two half-hour soundtracks done so far: Swamp and Dungeon.
- Swamp is about fighting magical creatures from European myth in a swamp.
- Dungeon is about delving a typical roguelike dungeon. Not the deep tunnels of the Underdark, or a tomb, for example.
DCSS soundtrack | YouTube playlist
I searched Pixabay for relevant royalty-free songs, then arranged them in a thematic lyrics-free playlist suitable for videogaming. Then I added a fantasy art slideshow to make it a YouTube video. The pictures are sequenced to suggest a story.
r/GameMusic appreciated my first soundtrack. r/RoguelikeDev is also very interested in free soundtracks, but the mods won't allow me to post my playlist there, because anything even tangentially related to my fork of DCSS isn't allowed. The main roguelike subreddits have banded together to forbid mention of my fork, because I observed that SJWs took over the DCSS community and ruined it.
This behavior is not specific to me; they previously banned mention of Malcolm Rose's fork of DCSS. Malcolm is the top DCSS streaker, and was banned by the DCSS mods for being conservative. The roguelikes subreddits embargoed and killed Malcolm's fork, because he was not aware that SJWs converge institutions against conservatives.
However, I anticipate the persecution and simply document it to build the case for replacing the converged institutions entirely. Reddit is rotten to the core. It is owned by Advance Publications, a Jewish company fostering a cultural revolution led by tranny mods. Github has a speech code as well, so my documentation is on the censorship-free Gitgud.io Gitlab instance.
Every bikini-clad beauty I include in my soundtrack videos reminds these miserable lunatics that they will never be a real woman. That's why the logo of r/dcsf is a naked water nymph. Forget stupid MacGuffins; a beautiful woman is the only prize worth fighting for!
Intro
DCSS famously lacks a plot, and what plot it has is admittedly incoherent in its amoral ambiguity:
On the face of it, the adventurer is simply seeking the Orb. Since “evil”-aligned adventurers act in essentially the same way that “good” ones do in pursuit of this goal, it is unlikely that the finding of this orb is a sufficiently good act in itself to justify the avalanche of butchery.
From being voted the #1 roguelike in 2008, DCSS has been surpassed in the last decade or so by its competitors. Perhaps it's time to add some polish and finally finish the game. The below terse plot resolves the game's moral ambiguities. Tell me whether this would motivate you to win.
Zot plot
From Council the Wizards of Zot fell to Cabal, consorting with chaos, corrupting the timelines, and meddling with souls. The Earth groaned, the people cried out, and the gods descended.
In wrath the lower gods slew the rebel Cabal, binding their essence into a tortured Orb, and declaring a contest to select new champions for the Council.
The Cabal's underworld Dungeon labyrinth was shattered through time, instanced, a virtual simulation powered by the souls of its victims. One winner from each race would seize the Orb and escape, proving his worthiness as sperm do an egg.
The prize? Training by your godly patron, initiation into the mysteries and laws, then to be sent back 20 years prior, to undo the Cabal's meddling. Thus spake Saturn, Chronos, elder god of Time.
Secret the contest was kept, to prevent earthly interference. Mundane adventurers who entered the Dungeon found only the Cabal's dark magic dulling their wits and subverting their will, until they wandered as thralls to the mad Orb.
Only those called by the gods, born of ancient bloodlines ready to awake, can pass through the Dungeon's grim gate with their minds unbroken, to dare the Trial of Champions. In these bloody halls the rulers of the next cycle will be threshed from the chaff like wheat!
[PIC: Saturn, Chronos, elder god of Time]
Conclusion
The SJW takeover of the dev team has led to the transformation of DCSS' game mechanics to match the moral relativism of its postmodern plot. Their goal is subversive; they will never accept any plot, let alone this one. Thus a fork is necessary.
To that end, I propose a fork from v.23 called "Darwin Crawl: Survival of the Fittest". The key feature is to use Ru as the missing difficulty setting, so that hardcore gamers players can be entertained with six new well-balanced difficulty levels, from Easy through Impossible. (The default game is considered "Beginner".) No more tedious streaking! This feature is playable now.
To learn more, visit Malcolm Rose's fork of the main DCSS subreddit. They banned Malcolm for being right-wing, despite the fact that he's the top DCSS streaker.
Fantasy authors are rarely as meticulous in their worldbuilding as JRR Tolkien. Thus fantasy countries are often borrowed from the history books, if not the current world map. For example, GRR Martin's Westeros is just the UK with some rotation.
"Overlord" by Kugane Maruyama is a fantasy isekai in which an introverted salaryman is reincarnated as a lich commanding a legion of monsters, whom he leads to genocide a country full of White Christians.
Nazarick is obviously revanchist Imperial Japan. Maruyama's resentment against Europeans is understandable, considering the USA's long history of dominating Japan.
In Overlord, some countries are majority human, whereas others are majority monster, e.g. minotaurs. The human countries often represent White countries. I can recognize a few just from their map and wiki descriptions:
- Re-Estize Kingdom = Australia, weak due to dependence on natural barriers, corrupt and divided, first White target for Japanese conquest
- Slane Theocracy = USA, aggressive high-tech theocratic republic with a racist history
- Baharuth Empire = Russia, with bloody tsar purging nobility.
- Roble Holy Kingdom = United Kingdom, complete with Hadrian's Wall and a queen. Abelion Hills = white cliffs of Dover = perfidious Albion = England.
The nearby lizard people are the Southeast Asians of Oceania whom Imperial Japan easily conquered.
I can't find China, probably because China is about to conquer Japan, and the author would prefer to reminisce about the glory days instead. It might be one or more of the "dragon" countries.
What others can you find?
Discussion
Why Australia?
- Proposed Japanese invasion of Australia during World War II | Wikipedia
- 1942 - An Overview of the Battle for Australia | ANZAC Day Commemoration Committee
The Japanese author might regard Australia as corrupt because it was founded by banished criminals and has much more murder than Japan. Or he might be criticizing the corruption and hypocrisy of the Anglosphere West in general, with Australia being merely the nearest example thereof. Japanese tend to be dismissive of Australia.
I explained the above to the r/Overlord subreddit. They didn't like it, and grew angry.
Overlord doesn't seem to be aimed at an audience with much awareness of geopolitics. Otherwise they might grow appalled at a Japanese man unsubtly glorifying the atrocities of the Japanese Imperial Army.
tl;dr: Roguelikes punish tilt. Use this classic to recenter between tasks.
Table of Contents
- Intro
- Best and only
- Polyphasic MP
- Lore
- Intro
- Inspiration
- Kroenen's clock
- Skarphedin's axe
- Plot
- Synopsis
- Dialogue
- Iconic Valkyrie
- Denouement
- Synchronicity
Intro
Why play an old game when there are so many new ones? Why read a Norse saga when there are so many new books? The answer is the same: mythic resonance. Time reveals great art, because only great art endures.
Castle of the Winds is the most-loved roguelike of its generation, because it echoed the Norse sagas. In a genre defined by procedural generation and snarky plotlessness, it dared to tell a timeless story of revenge against humanity's primordial enemy:
Surtur. Sauron. Satan. Saturn.
Castle of the Winds begins where the greatest Icelandic saga ends: with the survivor of a burnt house. Or did he survive it?
Castle of the Winds continues the saga tradition, but it is incomplete. There is no record of anyone beating the game on Expert, other than myself. There is no strategy written for how to do so. Vengeance is incomplete.
This game frustrated and enthralled us as children, but now we are adults. Why play a roguelike? Why a primitive one like CotW?
Sebastian Marshall answers the former question in his book, Roguelike. Humans are poor judges of quantitative and tail risks, which weakness roguelikes brutally correct.
After 30 years, there are certainly roguelikes with better ergonomics than CotW. They are addicting and capable of absorbing infinite time. Consider the opportunity cost.
Even on Expert difficulty, CotW is not so difficult with the correct strategy, which I will describe below. CotW's primitive ergonomics require patience, lest hasty manual exploration cause sudden death. Its save-load function permits a relaxed playstyle focused on learning, not typo avoidance. It is simple enough to provide mindless entertainment, yet still teaches prudent precise patient aggression.
Thus CotW is a good downtime game. The right brain needs time to decompress and reflect. CotW provides objective feedback on one's emotional equilibrium. It reminds that life is a migration, not a marathon, and the greatest foes are slain by a thousand cuts.
It has no soundtrack, so provide your own. I recommend something meditative:
- A Deep Sith Journey - Dark and Atmospheric Ambient Music - Sith Meditation | YouTube
- 432Hz Cosmic Music for Sleep & Lucid Dreaming | RAIN in SPACE | Sleeping Music, Dreaming Music | YouTube
Once CotW reports that one has found the stoic groove, the game becomes boring, and it is time to switch back to work. There is no mental residue. The small amount of info that needs to be remembered can be encoded into the environment by dropping a few coins next to the stairs:
- 1 means visited
- 2 means company
- 3's a crowd
- 4 means trap detection cast
- 5 means best stair
- 6 means danger
- 7 means safe
- 8 means object detection cast
Whatever frustration or troubles you may have, CotW reminds you that our people's true Enemy never sleeps, and grows stronger by the hour. He who wishes to be ready for the Last Day must grow stronger.
This is as true today as it was a thousand years ago, when Njal burned. Today all humanity lives in one house, and Surtur's flames lick at the walls, striving to find purchase.
Best and only
What are my CotW credentials? In my first attempt at recording a video game walkthrough, I beat the game in around 10 days (game time), without using the polyphasic MP technique. I don't recommend watching it. However, for all its flaws, it is still the only Expert-difficulty CotW playthrough on YouTube.
After reviewing my mistakes, I started playing again recently, and found the polyphasic playstyle a good way to decompress and recenter myself. It teaches to prudently balance caution and aggression, risk and reward, yet it's mindless enough to clear my head.
Eventually, everyone who survives to old age learns the necessity of rest and recuperation. I intend to make it easier for others to recalibrate with CotW by creating a proper strategy guide and walkthrough. There is no profit or audience, but it is useful writing practice and something I'd play anyway.
Polyphasic MP
If you are interested in cranking the difficulty to Expert and running a barbarian polyphasic sleeper, read on.
Abbreviations used:
- HP means hit points.
- MP means mana points.
- MMP means maximum mana points.
CotW has a primitive recovery mechanic that can be exploited.
HP and MP increase on the minute and hour respectively. Therefore Sleeping the whole minute or hour is unnecessary.
This trivia is of little usefulness for HP, which increases at the same rate whether sleeping or awake. The "Rest" verb merely automates idling until a monster is spotted or HP is full.
MP works differently. MP recovers twice as fast while Sleeping. This means it is possible to gain 2 MP in one minute or even one second by sleeping at the 59th minute of the hour. Quite the power nap!
A power nap can be performed even in the middle of melee combat, if one is precise. However, it is much easier to retreat and rest in a safe location. One difficulty is that Resting to recover MP may advance time past the hour mark, missing the chance to Sleep. Sleep is risky because one doesn't awaken until hit, so it is best to sleep starting from full HP. Therefore one should retreat to safety starting at around the 50th minute.
Another problem is that if MP is more than 2 below MMP, Sleep will continue past the hour mark until MP = MMP. This wastes time and allows Surtur's legions to strengthen. Therefore one should not spend more than 2 MP per hour.
A low-Intelligence barbarian build is much better at limiting mana expenditure to 2 MP per hour, because he can prevail in melee. A high-Intelligence wizard build struggles by comparison.
A barbarian can cast almost as much magic per hour as a mage. The only way mages get extra MP is when their MMP is relevant to mana regeneration, which happens at level up and when restoring mana from an external source such as a potion. The latter are rare in the early game, and the former depends on gaining XP through victories, which is dangerous when MP is depleted. The barbarian's greater efficiency with consumables means that he can afford to buy more magical consumables, resulting in a greater combined MP output by Bjarnhaven. The mage also has to spread his MP across more and stronger respawns than the barbarian.
Lore
Intro
This polyphasic sleep tactic seems cheesy and doesn't fit the game's original plot, which is why I ignored it last time. I've since developed a greater appreciation for the magic of temporal attunement. It still needs an plot explanation, though.
So consider this the missing lore for Castle of the Winds' "Experts only" difficulty setting. If you try speedrunning Expert difficulty, perhaps my headcanon will enhance your experience.
Inspiration
The fire is Skarphedin; the clock is Kroenen.
Warning: The following material is based and may cause contact with reality. The mods of r/roguelikes deem it unsafe for public consumption.
Kroenen's clock
I imagine the protagonist as similar to Karl Ruprecht Kroenen, the Nazi ninja from Hellboy. Intermittent magical shutdowns sounds like something the clockwork revenant Kronen would do. As does genociding subterranean ecosystems.
Nazi Science Experiments | Hellboy | Voyage | YouTube
Kroenen died when his heart was impaled by the spinning metal frame of a collapsing interdimensional portal to the realm of chaos.
The gods of chaos witnessed his dedication, and rewarded him for the sacrifice of hand and heart.
He returned as a revenant. The altered metal impaling him was reforged to replace his heart with clockwork gears, and to cast his tonfa blades, which he wields with uncanny grace in clockwork katas.
Karl Kroenen | Edit | Phonk | YouTube
In Castle of the Winds, the Amulet of Kings is a powerful artifact bound to the protagonist's bloodline. What if this artifact had a secret clockwork function? That might explain the bizarre polyphasic sleep ability. Perhaps it draws mana from the versions of the protagonist living in alternate timelines.
Skarphedin's axe
Castle of the Wind's designer Rick Saada obviously drew inspiration from Norse mythology. His name even sounds like "rich saga".
The protagonist has no name, allowing the player to name him. I needed a hero who fails his diplomacy check but overachieves in melee, with an endless appetite for blood feud. Skarphedin fits.
- [PIC: noted ice-skater Skarphedin]
- Skarphéðinn Njálsson | Hurstwic Library
- Bjorn Njals Saga Trial (Iceland, c. 1012) | Famous Trials
- Troll-Descended Bruisers: ‘Njal’s Saga’ | Tom Shippey, London Review of Books
- Njal’s Saga Chapters 124-145 Summary and Analysis | Gradesaver
- The story of Burnt Njal | Project Gutenberg
Skarphedin burned standing up. Now he will chop Surtur down.
Plot
Legends vary in the telling; a core of truth remains.
Synopsis
Skarphedin didn't quite survive the attack on his godparents' farm. So far, no one has pointed this out to him. In fact, it is remarkable how small-talk and foot traffic drop to zero in his vicinity. "Aptrganger", they whisper.
He died with his dagger bloodied, so the Valkyries came, but he would not follow. Instead he cried out to Hel, offering his soul in exchange for vengeance. Hel's icy voice answered: "A year with me for every hour of life, until your vengeance is wrought, Einherjar."
"Done," Skarphedin spat through broken jaw.
Hel laughed then, delighted to claim a soul from Odin forevermore, knowing the lad would fall just as easily a second time.
Dialogue
"Well fought, young warrior."
"Where are my godparents?"
"You bloodied your blade. They did not."
"My father was a warrior. They surprised him."
"Your godfather died in bed."
"And my mother?"
"Goes with him."
"…"
"I know a young shieldmaiden or two who've been watching over you. They will ease your sorrow. We've all lost someone."
"Watching for what?! What of vengeance?"
"You will have it in the Last Battle. The hour draws near. These lands perish."
"And my godparents fight on the other side."
"Yes. I am sorry."
"They belong to Hel."
"Only a fool bargains with her. Do not speak her name in this place."
"…"
"Those monsters came for me, didn't they."
"Yes. It is time for you to meet your true parents, Skarphedin. They love you very much."
"I love my mother. HEL! HELL! HELLL!"
"Thrice spoken and answered, handsome. How the fairies fret."
"He is ours, vulture. Leave or die."
"You know the Accords. The Coven will pick your boness."
"You have one minute."
"Mm, she wants him bad." Her black eyes widened and her voice deepened. "My Mistress makes an offer."
"My soul for my godmother, hag."
"Daddy issues? Why not both? Just kill the one who ordered their deaths."
"Done!"
"It's a trick, you fool! Don't throw away your birthright!"
"You have only a fortnight; then we claim your soul."
"Then get me up, while the trail is fresh."
"Oh I'll get you up, dearie. Won't you prudes stay and watch?"
"Odin will hear of this!"
"Tell him all the details!"
"What… What are you aarghhll…"
Odin's eye gleamed, and the Amulet of Kings began to tick.
"Careful what you wish for, sister."
(I omitted attribution in the dialogue above to evoke the dreamlike state of death. Here is the sequence of speakers: Valkyrie, Skarphedin, Harpy. VSVSVSVSVSVSVSVSSVSHVHVHSHSVHSHVHS)
Iconic Valkyrie
CotW offers two default icons; using others is buggy and difficult. Unfortunately, the male icon is immersion-breaking due to his naked torso and speedo. So here's a headcanon to render the female icon palatable:
The female icon is Herja the Valkyrie, guiding Skarphedin and tilting the odds of battle. "Herja" means "devastation". She is the girl for the job.
Read the next section AFTER killing Surtur.
Denouement
Hel stood before the throne, head bowed, fists trembling, until finally Odin spoke:
"It has been too long, sister. Regarding my general, who holds the keys to Hel. Let us discuss the terms of your surrender…"
Synchronicity
From my Emacs text journal:
played first game of cotw using polyphasic sleep strategy
after shopping at hamlet, had 77 cp remaining, wondered whether it was an angel number
died after being teleport trapped first step into mine 1
fun running battle, could've survived if slightly more aggressive blitzing back to stairs
died with 17 xp
1817 timestamp
ether amused by my Nordic fanfic, confirmed
good lesson in how to survive the ultimate trapping
slow down, think it through!2023-02-08 Wed 18:17
I saved this game before dying and will reenact it in for the walkthrough, to show how to cast Magic Arrow with negative MP to survive a worst-case scenario.
Update: I recorded a video to prove the file creation date and show the trap, but it turns out the Mine level 1 was randomly generated after the save. So it only shows the 77 cp remaining, and the death with 17 XP, not the trap that killed me.
- Skarphedin synchronicity | YouTube
- Lyrics to Synchronicity, by the Police
- Hail Odin.
Let's say, hypothetically, that after an "asteroid" destroyed the dinosaurs, the Earth was formless and void. And the Elohim hovered over the waters. And they decided to make a new race of sapients in their own image. So they created the angels, avian humanoids who dwelled in the ethereal plane, soaring through Earth's thick dust-filled atmosphere. And their skin was bluish white, like the blue sky, and like arctic animals who dwell at latitudes with little sunlight.
Then much later came the age of mammals, and of men. Whenever men met the angels, they were afraid of these shining giants. So the angel would say, "Be not afraid." Sometimes their ethereal wings were visible, sometimes not, but they had no hair, for that is a mammalian trait.
Does that ring any bells? The Aesir, the frost giants, the Prometheus Engineers, Pinhead from Hellraiser, Sephiroth, to name a few?
And if these angels happen to be the patrons of the Caucasian race, whose national symbols so often include eagles, is that racist? Is that forbidden? Can we not talk about how the Angel is the tier-7 creature of the Castle faction in Heroes of Might and Magic 3, because its art draws upon humanity's racial memory, making it an enduring classic?
I would expect as much from Reddit, but your janny just told me that saying White people are hybridized with angels is racist.
I'd like to apologize for insinuating that white people are highly individualistic, have large straight beaks, are fearless and creative, have visionary foresight, create great art, etc. Please forget I associated Aryans with the eagle and the songbird. Especially not Odin's ravens, that would be horrible.
We are only allowed to say that all human beings descended from chimps and came out of Africa. We are all the same. Open borders and open assholes for all!
Edit: Wow Diablo really hit the nail on the head:
Two steps from hell - Archangel (Extended) Diablo 3 cinematics https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W9HO-Mfv4Is
Table of Contents
- Based HoMM3
- Devilishly difficult
- Starting bonus
- Map
- Summary
- Towns
- Turtle power
- Hill Fort
- Might vs Magic
- Dragon Queen
- Level 7 creature recruitment
- Resources
- Strategy
- Victory condition
- Bad starts
- Might vs Magic
- Keymaster closed
- Homecoming comparison
- No blitz like home
- Sea unites, land divides
- Operations
- Circle the volcano.
- Prairie blitz
- Demon farming well
- Date
- run 3
- m1
- m2
- Summary
- run 3
- Competitors
- Meridian
- w1
- Summary
- Comparison
- MasterKD
- Conclusion
- Meridian
- Further reading
Based HoMM3
Heroes of Might and Magic 3 (HoMM3) is a classic beloved game, over 20 years old yet still with active multiplayer and modding scenes. It is arguably the best turn-based strategy videogame of all time, largely due to its beautiful art and mythic resonance.
Inferno is one of the eight original factions. Its theme is Hell and volcanoes. Its art is saturnine and semitic. Its central mechanic is human sacrifice of allies to summon demons.
- [PIC: Inferno's imp siphons 20% of MP like a bankster, and is the weakest creature in the game]
- [PIC: le happy merchant]
A coincidental resemblance. Jews don't actually conduct mass human sacrifices of their nominal Greatest Allies by stabbing them with poisoned jabs, right? cough
- Pfizer CEO’s Jewish Past Inspired Vaccine Work | Atlanta Jewish Times
- Former Moderna CMO Zaks goes back to his Israeli roots, reemerging as Teva board director | Fierce Pharma
- COVID19 is an ethnically targeted bioweapon targeting Europeans and sparing Ashkenazis.
The countless Jewish expulsions happened for no reason whatsoever. To suggest they practice human sacrifice is blood libel.
- A Holocaust of Biblical Proportions | Laurent Guyénot
- Zionists Sacrificed Jews to the Holocaust | Henry Makow
Loving the "Jews" because you love the Bible is like loving South American 'immigrants" because you love the Constitution. It is a wilful denial of the self-evident via naive sophistry.
- Confused? Read the Protocols of Zion (c. 1892) | Henry Makow
- The Harold Rosenthal Interview | Henry Makow
- Solzhenitsyn on the Jews & Soviet Russia | F. Roger Devlin
- Historians Confirm Karl Marx Was Employed By The Rothschilds | News Punch
- Communist democide stats through 1987: ~110m
But why would they…
- [PIC: le happy merchant, 2000BC to present]
- Space Aliens | Clif High
- [PIC: reptilian controlling human]
- [PIC: reptilian variants]
- [PIC: reptilian le happy merchant]
Oh come on, that's…
- [PIC: le reptilian in charge; food chain]
- Moderna CEO Bancel Worshipped Demon “Baphomet” | Michael Baxter
- JRR Tolkien translated the Silmarillion from secret Atlantean history. GRR Martin sold his soul to the Devil to write the Reptilian version of our future. Epic fantasy indeed. | r/asoiafcirclejerk
Obligatory caveat: Not All Jews Are Like That. One of the sources repeatedly linked above, Henry Makow, is a Jew. My mother regaled me with stories of the Holocaust from her relatives, some of them true. She took the jab and had a fall recently. I am done holding back.
Jews aren't unique in their reptilian heritage. Sub-Saharans show a much stronger influence; see Credo Mutwa. The three human macro-races (Caucasian, Mongoloid and Negroid) are avian, insectoid and reptilian hybrids, respectively.
We called them gods, once. Humans have evolved far too much ethnic diversity in too short a time to be explained by natural evolutionary processes. In fact, we are about to find out where the gods went.
Step 1 of apocalypse management is thinning the herd.
- Swedish anon predicts deadly jab | pol
- Take some Cabal insight | pol
- Sasquatch was right about the jab | Sunbow
As the Aztecs knew, there are spiritual and military benefits to summoning demons via mass human sacrifice, which I will now demonstrate (in HoMM3).
TakenUsernameA wrote:
Instructions unclear, the demon I summoned made my people gay
SideEffectsMayIncludeSodomyErectileDysfunctionAndEternalDamnationContactYourLocalRabbiForDetails
Devilishly difficult
As part of my plan to introduce based gamers to Emacs Org-Mode, I am writing next-generation walkthroughs for the HoMM3 campaigns. "Devils and Dungeons" is the second campaign, and "A Devilish Plan" is the introductory scenario for Inferno. My scenario walkthrough has a 94% ratio on r/Heroes3.
In my controversial walkthrough of Long Live the Queen, I found the AI was losing too quickly to fully demonstrate my unorthodox strategies. Therefore I resolved to increase the difficulty beyond Impossible in the next campaign, Dungeons and Devils. I did this by choosing the worst starting bonus option (there are three).
The starting bonus makes a huge difference, so I didn't set a speed record this time. There would be no point in doing so, since Meridian already dominated the AI on week 1, skipping the map with the overpowered strength of the best starting bonus option.
To my knowledge, no one has won this scenario on Impossible using the Slayer scroll bonus. Thus my win is unprecedented.
The extra difficulty was exactly what I needed. It forced me to master demon farming, a counterintuitive mechanic for one accustomed to Castle and Rampart.
Later scenarios in a campaign obscure the early game mechanics with the overwhelming strength of leveled heroes. Therefore Devilish Plan is the best map to learn how to play Inferno.
Here's my 6.5h gameplay video, with Inferno soundtrack and no commentary, on YouTube. Below are my notes.
Starting bonus
There are three options, as always:
- 100 imps help win adjacent fights, and are easily upgraded.
- Armor of Wonder: +1x4 is less useful initially due to lack of mage guild and strong local creep.
- Slayer scroll is garbage since dragon kills happen after AI is defeated.
The roadless prairie is the player's main defense against the AI, who might get a dragon from its two Refugee Camps any week. So the Slayer scroll is theoretically useful as insurance, sort of like the overpriced two-year warranty on electronics that cashiers always try to upsell you.
In practice, the AI won't do a level-7 creature rush because it has too many nearby targets. The player will have time to build up enough troops to handle the odd level-7 creature. Thus the 100 imps' faster start is better.
Map
Summary
- Middle towns can't build, but have troops to hire.
- Hill Fort is strategic, but its guard is strong.
- AI has immediate access to the rich roadless prairie, whereas player must clear 2+ roadblocks.
- Observatories and wells are key.
- AI gets 2 refugee camps but can't built Dragon Cliffs.
Towns
The redwood observatories near each Rampart town are especially important due to the large, roadless map.
The main Rampart town is weaker than the Inferno. Rampart can't build Capitol or Dragon Cliffs.
The other towns are disabled except for a couple buildings each, such as tavern, mage guild, and level 1-2 creature dwellings.
Turtle power
The main Rampart town is weaker than the main Inferno town. Therefore if Tan survives into the late game and prevents Red from killstealing the Queen, Tan wins.
Red can't kill the Queen without visiting the keymaster's tent in Tan's southeast corner. This favors turtling.
Hill Fort
The Hill Fort is strategic. If the AI denies the player access, then player can't upgrade Rampart troops, and must pay for Inferno upgrades, which is crippling. AI can sit in middle Castle and use stables to raid far. Big problem.
However, the player only needs to visit it weekly, and can visit it safely in force.
Might vs Magic
Wells are key. Mages march along the edges following the wells. Mighties fight in the middle grassland.
Mages hold the flanks; Mighties raid the middle.
Dragon Queen
I turtled with cheats and fast-forwarded to see what the AI would do. On m2w4d1 Red defeated the Dragon Queen! Moreover, this counted as victory for Red!
This means that player can open the gate guard and bait AI into taking casualties fighting the dragons, opening the way for player to killsteal or counterattack.
The queen is just a lone Gold Dragon, much easier than the battles with her retinue. An Archdevil does 33-44 damage on a Gold Dragon, with a +3 Attack hero. With Slayer, it's 45-60. The Archdevil wins, either way.
Player's minimum strategic priorities are as follows:
- Defend Inferno from AI.
- Open the gate guard to dragons.
- Kill dragon queen before AI.
If the war with the AI looks lost, player can still take his whole army and attempt regicide.
Level 7 creature recruitment
The main Rampart cannot build Dragon Cliffs, but Inferno can build a Forsaken Palace. Thus player has an advantage in the late game.
However, Rampart has two Refugee Camps that compensate for this. They spawn a random creatures every week, of any level.
Things I've seen:
- lol sure enough, Theodorus shows up on m1w2d6 with a few Wyvern Monarchs and a Black Dragon. Great.
- m1w3d4 devil spotted, great.
Resources
Resource income is more abundant than gold, assuming one uses Mages to clear creep. This encourages building high-level Mage guilds, and using the wells to capitalize.
Eventually the player reaches a Trading Post, allowing him to sell surplus resources for gold. However, it is on Red's side of the map, so leveling Inferno's mage guild first is strategic.
Inferno saves on magical resources by not upgrading creature dwellings, relying on the Hill Fort instead.
Strategy
Victory condition
The de-facto victory condition is securing both main towns.
This requires either defeating the AI's main heroes or having adequate defenses to deter them, such as a castled week's growth.
The AI does not understand the necessity of holding a main town, so it is easy to trick into garrisoning a crippled middle town until it is too late.
Bad starts
Bad luck in the early game slows tempo. Some examples:
- Heroes are all mages, most with useless starting spells. Solution: Prioritize level 1 mage guild.
- Southeast Rampart has a strong garrison.
- Strong sawmill roadblocks bottleneck wood and delay prairie scouts.
Might vs Magic
In the early game, the problem with the mage guild is that Inferno heroes have such low Knowledge it's hardly worthwhile to give them level 2 spells, or even a collection of level 2 spells. They can just continue casting their level 1 spells occasionally, for minor effect. It is better to improve the army so that their casting can make a difference against the overpowered creep, which is too numerous for level 1-2 hero spell damage to make a difference. A team of Mages levels slowly while sharing an army, and Inferno usually gains Spellpower, not Wisdom.
Thus a main Might hero is much better than a Mage at the start. This is unfortunate, since Inferno's theme is burst Fire Magic damage. The map's wells look like a strategic resource, but their early relevance is greatly reduced by Mage weakness. Fortunately, Heretics start with 1 Attack and Defense. Skip the well creep until the Mage army is strong enough for demon farming.
Keymaster closed
Opening the Dragon Queen's lair requires visiting keymaster tents:
- red keymaster and southeast Rampart
- southwest Castle and green keymaster
This is a bad idea, because it gives the AI a chance to win by killing the Dragon Queen first. The keymaster tent is irrelevant to defeating the AI in a quick game. Therefore the Dragon Queen victory point should be kept sealed until the AI is defeated.
Character limit reached
If you'd like to continue reading, request a link to the original version in the comments, because rules.
Table of Contents
- Was it something I said?
- Unreliable guides
- Records set
- Hero development
- Declining difficulty
- Mighty vs Mage
- Morale and Diplomacy
- Overview
- Campaign
- Fluff
- Next campaign
- Iconic handicap
- Gorbag's joke
[pic: queen
caption: Separation of church and state is like cleavage.]
Was it something I said?
This series has multiple purposes, one of which is to introduce gamers to Emacs Org-mode so they can use their obsessiveness to win at health, wealth and worldview, despite Clown World's best efforts to poison, impoverish and deceive them. Playing HoMM3 is a good way to learn Org-mode without risking your critical info on an unfamiliar app.
r/Heroes3 gave the first campaign writeup a 50% ratio despite upvoting its three scenario writeups 90%. Maybe it's my heterodox strategy, or the mention of trannies and whores, or the implication that separation of church and state is illusory?
Unreliable guides
- Changing the difficulty for this tutorial campaign requires using the campaign editor.
- The guides are not written for Impossible difficulty, so only the background info is reliable.
Records set
I found only two competitors who played this campaign on Impossible: Meridian and MasterKD.
The win conditions in this campaign were not suitable for timed evaluation. The first two scenarios encourage the player to secure dominance and then develop his heroes at leisure before defeating Tan. The last scenario encourages the player to defeat Orange and then build up a large army at leisure to overcome static defenses.
Therefore I evaluated based on time to dominate the AI via town conquest, which worked in all but one game (MasterKD's Griffin Cliff playthrough).
- In Homecoming, my win was on day 26, and Meridian's win was on day 33. 7/26 = 27% faster.
- In Guardian Angels, I was 150% faster than Meridian
- In Griffin Cliff, I was 25% faster than Meridian, with MasterKD impressive but non-comparable.
On average, I was about 100% faster. Scenario #2 was an outlier relying on Diplomacy snowball; 26% faster is the usual improvement. My wins were more robust and tolerant of tactical errors, making the strategy demonstrated user-friendly. For example, I had a larger advantage in kingdom army size on the victory dates. I didn't invade the AI until my advantage was overwhelming.
Hero development
- Navigation and Pathfinding are useful in Homecoming but not thereafter.
- Prefer Castle heroes since starting towns are all Castle, and starting terrain is grass.
- Having Dungeon or Inferno heroes is not worthwhile.
Declining difficulty
Once the enemy AI is defeated, I turn on cheats to ease the tedium of developing my heroes for the next scenario. This contributed to an observable negative difficulty curve. Scenario 1 was the hardest and scenario 3 the easiest.
Each scenario had a strategic quest that granted de-facto victory:
- Homecoming had imprisoned Orrin, who was most difficult to take before Nighon.
- Guardian Angels had the Angel Wings and the 2 extra pressgangable Archangels.
- Griffin Cliff had the Seer's 50 griffins and Conservatory for 4 angels, which was easily completed and practically impossible for Nighon to take.
This was odd, but I guess the goal of the tutorial was to increase complexity gradually. The designers used the difficulty setting to increase difficulty rather than map design.
In all cases, the AI lost sooner than expected, usually before I could implement my full strategy.
I did not have unused operations on Homecoming, because it was difficult enough I had to script it tactically rather than operationally. Starting with only one hero also blurs the lines between tactics and operations. I felt I had blitzed a dangerous foe.
In Guardian Angels, it felt more like pouncing on helpless prey. In Griffin Cliff, it felt no different than clearing creep. That was anticlimactic.
Mighty vs Mage
You may have noticed my heterodox hero development. Might heroes do not get Wisdom or magic schools, focusing on mundane combat. Mages don't get physical combat skills, focusing on magic.
Mighties and Mages are meant to play different strategic roles. Mages cast with small high-level armies, while Mighties conquer with large low-level armies.
This was demonstrated in the first and last scenarios. The middle one was a pure snowball.
In Homecoming, Mighty Christian blitzed with low-level troops while Mages cleared creep at home.
In Griffin Cliff, the Mages used their starting MP to rip the scenario apart. They cleared roadblocks, Diplomacied, and teleported to strategic points. The Mighties scouted and harvested. Orange lost before the Mighties could do much fighting, but Diplomacy Mighties did snowball conquer two of Orange's three towns.
Morale and Diplomacy
Overview
Morale is a central Castle theme. Castle gets high morale via angels and Leadership.
A point of negative morale is much more harmful than a point of positive morale is helpful. This incentivizes adding irregulars to an army until its morale is neutral.
Diplomacy therefore synergizes with Castle's Morale theme, providing many irregulars to absorb surplus morale.
Most skills are suitable for either Might or Magic heroes. However, some skills are suitable for either support or main heroes, e.g. Estates. Diplomacy is a main hero skill. It is wasted on a support hero who will rarely have a large army, and then only late in the game.
Campaign
The Long Live the Queen campaign emphasizes morale and Diplomacy:
- The Library of Enlightenment in Homecoming requires Advanced Diplomacy to enter.
- One should level at least one Diplomacy hero in Homecoming, ideally two: a Mighty and Mage. This is easy after securing the surface.
- This allows snowballing in the next scenario, Guardian Angels.
- In Griffin Cliff, it allows Castle recruitment in the starting zone, and underdark diplomacy to vanquish Orange.
Fluff
Whores and war go together like brothels and ports.
Why the high morale for human armies? My theory is that their camp followers offer the most bang for your buck. Yes elves are prettier, but only the officers can afford them.
Humans are unspecialized templates who hybridize easily with other species, with a high libido and a roughly 1:1 sex ratio. There is more than one kind of silver tongue.
Next campaign
In the last campaign, I won too quickly, preventing me from fully testing my strategies. The next campaign is Dungeons and Devils. So I'll make it devilishly hard.
Iconic handicap
The first scenario is Devilish Plan. The orthodox strategy is to select the 100 imp starting bonus and blitz Red's main town. Meridian won on m1w3d1, faster than MasterKD's win on m1w4d7. Nobody wants to see that strategy a third time.
Meridian's method was fastest, but it mostly skips the map. It's a boring generic strategy with high risk of failure. For example, it's easy to get lost in the roadless unscouted grassland — which he does and has to reload! A strategy guide should do better. I promise to scout the prairie like Comanche before plunging in like Custer.
Here's my handicap. The orthodox starting bonus is 100 imps. Instead I'll pick the Slayer scroll, because it is iconic for the dragon-centric win condition. The spell helps kill huge beasts such as dragons.
Presumably Slayer is the worst choice. It's easier to just defeat the AI and then build up at leisure. The AI can't even build Dragon Cliffs.
However, the AI does have two Refugee Camps which could randomly offer behemoths, dragons, etc at any time. So the Slayer scroll is basically like those 2-year warranties on electronics that they always try to sell you at checkout. Not totally useless, but definitely for morons.
In the previous campaign, the consensus bonus was also iconic, so that's what I picked:
- 14 Pikemen for Homecoming's Halberdier blitz to Orrin
- an Angel for Guardian Angels
- Lion's Shield of Courage for Griffin Cliff
I'll always pick iconic over orthodox. In future scenarios, I might continue picking the worst bonus, to give the AI a chance. I want to write strategy for struggling players, so I must suffer with them.
Below is a bit of hellish fluff about how the Inferno player ended up with the Slayer scroll.
Gorbag's joke
The problem with working for devils is the ubiquitous treachery. Gorbag, your boss, knows you're gunning for his job. That's a given. The prick also has it in for your clan. Infernal politics. That's why your backpack is empty save for this useless scroll, and your retinue consists of nothing but your personal guard.
By all accounts, you're on your way to a freshly-sprouted volcano about to be stomped by AvLee's rangers. The Dragon Queen was tipped off (surprise, surprise) and is buttoned up tighter than a baby's butthole.
Speaking of assholes, you pull out the scroll and examine Gorbag's tracking seal. You can't even sell the "strategically invaluable artifact" to fund your campaign; he'll have you crucified in a heartbeat. If you somehow survive this, you promise to introduce Gorbag to your favorite sexecutioner. Lady Pain may not be a lady, or even conventionally female, but no one is better equipped to give Gorbag a lesson in professional courtesy.