I disagree that to win you have to become a cold, caring monster. There are women attracted to that and the "dark personality traits" but most just want a fit, confident mate at the end of the day. To "win", just go to the gym and fix your diet and confidence does follow when you get to a level of fitness and healthier eating.

Not just from the increased attraction you will recieve, but being a stronger physical person not subsiding on junk food helps bring it out.