I'm trying to navigate this hellscape of a dating scene- bisexual girl over here, feminist over there... And I can really empathize with them, even though I view the world politically very differently than they do. Thought I might share that view with you all at KIA2.
One suggested I read Roxanne Gay's Bad Feminist, and I opted to at least listen to a summary of the book. And my mind makes connections.
"Reality TV...Rock of Love, relationships defined by flowing alcohol, forced Interactions, vicious conflict, stripper poles..." I don't know about stripper poles, but my brother- Christian, right-wing, 8 years in military+now going to law school- checks all the other boxes. Drinks too much, loves strife and brings it home to his (direct and extended) family, so forceful and insistent on having everything exactly the way he wants, with zero considerations to the wants and needs of others, that on his bookshelf he even has a book titled, "The Little Book on Getting Your Way".
And then..."Rape Culture- Men's Agression and Violence Normalized." I've watched my brother have to apologize to his wife for throwing things... 10 years ago, I watched him punch holes in walls and break down doors in his anger towards me. I've watched him not care for his wife or kids- he got two daughters, but he really wanted a son. He had sex out of wedlock at least once with a girl other than his current wife...But I would guess his actual body count was more than just two. And then, when our father died, he got so drunk he was flirting with other women, as a married man.
And so, I can't help but wonder if it's not """Christian""", right-wing men like my brother driving the feminist movement forward.
I start to see the current political landscape from the lens of men vs. women, with externalizers wrongfully lashing out in anger and impulsively acting on selfish desires, and internalizers, also wrongfully, deeply resenting and seeking vengeance for the harm those externalizers have caused.
And I wonder how we could ever sort out our differences- how to find the third path forward, where, even with greater emotional maturity on the part of both men and women (no externalizing or internalizing), men are seeking wedlock / family / stay-at-home mom's / etc., whereas women are seeking sexual freedom / abortion / homosexuality / one-night stands / etc. How could those differences ever be worked out, without trying to mold others to our liking, without trying to manipulate or control or deceive? (I can imagine someone commenting that women are more malleable... I'm against manipulative, controlling behaviors regardless. Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the like are a scam.)
I'm Christian. And Right-Wing. But I'm not my brother. I don't drink. I haven't been punching holes in walls in fits of rage. I haven't had sex and don't intend to until I get married. I just want to find a wife and start a family.
Where is the path forward, how are Christian, right-wing men to make it through this world, when so many other men also call themselves Christian as they cause destruction and strife and chaos in their wake? Where is the path forward when women have come to hate all that could be good for them- God, men, marriage, family, children, etc.- and love all that will likely be bad for them- abortion, sex out of wedlock, career, LGBT, etc...?
Just a lost soul trying to find his way. Thanks for reading.
Welcome to the dating scene created by lack of male role models, false female idols promoting a 'you can have it all' attitude and not acknowledging biological deadlines, an instant hook up sex gratification culture and a refusal to leave a self focused vision for a family oriented ironically more socialist position (it only works in family units only).
Those of us not part of this have to wade through the sea of bullshit to find someone similar. The only reason I see some more success within religion is they still have some of the old school connections to matchmake that bypasses the bullshit. If you don't have that you try for the few sane left, I'm atheist and I'd pick a deeply religious woman over ANY of those still in this mindset so long as for kids 1. No religious body changes 2. Free choice of religion or non religious. Those two can REALLY cut down your options.
Other than meeting through hobbies (which is getting increasingly compromised thanks to the left) there is little options as you can't meet through work anymore thanks to HR departments and that's how A LOT of long term couples formed, bars and clubs....you really want the kind of girl plastered drunk in a short dress on a Friday as it's a 'fun time' and it's made worse by media organisations repeating the message 'it's not women's fault they aren't getting boyfriends, men have to try harder'. Then you have the weird messaging I'm hearing more of women EXPECTING a man to be cheating to be a successful option, just wtf?
As you pointed out, boomer ls are making things worse posting online about a dating scene they have no clue about and was caused by their previous lifestyles. I don't know, this is a world where you're more likely to find a good partner on online games or at least, smarter not accounts.