It's because there very much is a distinction between a tradcuck and a tradcon. Just like how there's a distinction between a Classical Liberal and a Modern Liberal (leftist). People who despise tradcucks often associate all tradcons with tradcucks, just like how people who despise Marxists often associate all Liberals with Marxism even though Classical Liberals aren't really Marxists.

It's basically the same dynamic.

Here's how you can tell a tradcuck from a tradcon (though the differences vary). Ask a tradcon if he thinks a wife should have duty to provide sex for her husband. If he says no, that's rape and is wrong, he's a tradcuck. This is especially true of Christians like Torba because the bible literally says in different words that a woman's duty is to provide sex which is likely where such duty came into fruition in the past. A true tradcon would say yes, that's how things used to be. If she isn't doing her duty she should be punished also.

The big difference between a tradcuck and a tradcon is that a tradcon believes in assuring women provide adequate value to men through BEING HELD ACCOUNTABLE to provide such value, whether that's through physical beatings of women, the judicial system or some form of coercion such as financial coercion. A tradcuck believes in all the traditional gender roles without women being held accountable to their role. Tradcucks are basically peak simps. They are nothing more than slaves to women and the best kind of slave because they don't even realize they are a slave. Women love tradcucks but tradcucks are no friend of men. Tradcucks are literally the worst kind of male feminist.