I'm hoping the medical school is going to be dragged through court for expelling him. Then the perp. I'd probably conspire to make their life a living hell for the next hundred years.

[pulls out phone - hits voice memo]

"Idea: Online matchmaking service called 'Crisscross.whatever' where you exchange victims and coordinate revenge so you each always have an alibi". Maybe I can get an endorsement from Danny DeVito.