Just that. I know that’s rather… Odd, perhaps, and overly “wholesome” of me, but I just wanted to say that I genuinely appreciated it. All of it.
I’m not used to that level of kindness, from random internet strangers (Reddit mostly isn’t, except, I’ve found, from a few more niche subs, and some of the sporting ones, oddly), or on the internet more broadly (see: Facebook).
I’m also just… Not used to people being kind (I hate that word. But it seems to be the best for the situation). People in my life… Haven’t been that. Not family. Rarely friends, for any lasting length of time. So kindness, when it comes, is… Frankly kind of disarming. Like it feels like I don’t deserve it, almost..?
Terrible, I know. I have to work on being kind to myself. Then at least I don’t have to rely on anyone else for that, I guess, lol.
Anyway, just wanted you all to know that I really appreciated it, and it meant more to me than you might… Perhaps feel it should have.
All the best, and I’ll shut up, now. I’m going to try to put my pain and… Adrenaline, I guess (rather than “hurt”, or “anger”) into heavy exercise, so that at least it goes somewhere… “Positive”, i guess, if nothing else.
Thanks again. Keep it real, and stay honest. Oh, and fuck the Great Reset/all of this Covid bullshit. Do your best to fight back, as I have, and continue to.
Yeah, that’s kind of the plan, tbh…
I just know that the funeral will be fucking narcissist heaven, so it just… Frustrates me that I have to go through that, again.
But I’ll do it for the old man. And for his wife, who is obviously still alive…
But yeah, I agree. I just can’t believe how horrible they’re all being today, smh…
Like, it’s absolutely wild how badly everyone involved is behaving, right now. Like it’s fucking exposed all their pent-up bullshit while he was still alive, and now the rats are all turning on each other, and, naturally, on me…
I actually don’t give a hoot what is in the will. I know I won’t be in it, anyway (he wasn’t that kind of person), and besides, he had dementia for literally half a decade or so, so I can only imagine how much they… Corrupted it.
But I really, really don’t want to be here to see all that.
So you’re right. I’ll stay for that, and then… Leave. I’ll support my grandma’s claims however I can (I hadn’t mentioned this, but their relationship… Was very unhealthy. So she deserves to get all of it, whatever “it” may be, IMHO. It feels… Pretty morally repugnant that I’m gonna have to fight against my parents, about that), but I’ll do that from afar. Like, interstate or overseas. Because this is just… So bad.
I’m in a lot of emotional/mental pain, right now, dude. I actually can’t keep up with the shit they do, it’s so bad.
Sorry for sperging (again). 😔