How to give a lefty an aneurism: "We have banned the sale of Avocado toast, as our studies have found the mass import of avocado products for affluent white bourgeousie has left the disadvantaged non-American people of color in Mexico unable to even purchase produce grown in their own country thanks to white privilege big business globalization. We have likewise banned select soy products for the same reasons. This unprecedented temporary measure will continue for two weeks to flatten the inequalities in country produce production."