In short: Where should I go to develop genuine connections with good people?

Why post this in KIA2? Well, I'm lost, maybe this is the wrong place for this discussion. I'm this mix of a Christian who likes games, VR, anime, etc., and I don't feel like I fit in anywhere.

If I go to Japan, even tho I'm fluent, I'll never be a native Japanese citizen, and where are the wise amongst their people? The older generation is so quick to condemn; the younger generation, picking up on western leftism it seems.

If I go to church, most Christians / people in general haven't actually developed the wisdom Christianity could provide them with, and may not have anything to do with JP/games/anime/VR.

If I go to VRChat, even in the relatively better communities I find narcissistic feminist women, furries, leftists, etc. are a dime a dozen. As socialites, there are a rare few who have gained some wisdom, but as with other communities I've seen, few and far between.

If I go take a dance class, I find older, conservative men and women, a younger narcissistic feminist woman (but hey, at least I can connect with those women on games and anime...), a younger Christian woman raised in a broken family, lacked self-esteem and got plastic surgery and breast implants because of it... Seems maybe some other homeschooled girls out there, too...? (Where's the younger men? Playing video games I guess? XD)

If I go to an anime or game convention, well now you have all this mask and vaccine stuff and it just doesn't seem worth it anymore.

So, it seems to me that the wise are few and far between wherever you go, and just about any place people gather and like games/anime/VR is captured by leftism. So where am I supposed to go?

I feel like I need to create my own community, because the community I'm looking for just doesn't exist. I've written a 3D engine from scratch in Vulkan for VR that can do online multiplayer, maybe I'll just try and setup a little community there+Discord+Twitter+Twitch...? I'm not sure I'm cut out to be a community leader, but if I don't do it, I'm not sure who will.

I'm trying to navigate this hellscape of a dating scene- bisexual girl over here, feminist over there... And I can really empathize with them, even though I view the world politically very differently than they do. Thought I might share that view with you all at KIA2.

One suggested I read Roxanne Gay's Bad Feminist, and I opted to at least listen to a summary of the book. And my mind makes connections.

"Reality TV...Rock of Love, relationships defined by flowing alcohol, forced Interactions, vicious conflict, stripper poles..." I don't know about stripper poles, but my brother- Christian, right-wing, 8 years in military+now going to law school- checks all the other boxes. Drinks too much, loves strife and brings it home to his (direct and extended) family, so forceful and insistent on having everything exactly the way he wants, with zero considerations to the wants and needs of others, that on his bookshelf he even has a book titled, "The Little Book on Getting Your Way".

And then..."Rape Culture- Men's Agression and Violence Normalized." I've watched my brother have to apologize to his wife for throwing things... 10 years ago, I watched him punch holes in walls and break down doors in his anger towards me. I've watched him not care for his wife or kids- he got two daughters, but he really wanted a son. He had sex out of wedlock at least once with a girl other than his current wife...But I would guess his actual body count was more than just two. And then, when our father died, he got so drunk he was flirting with other women, as a married man.

And so, I can't help but wonder if it's not """Christian""", right-wing men like my brother driving the feminist movement forward.

I start to see the current political landscape from the lens of men vs. women, with externalizers wrongfully lashing out in anger and impulsively acting on selfish desires, and internalizers, also wrongfully, deeply resenting and seeking vengeance for the harm those externalizers have caused.

And I wonder how we could ever sort out our differences- how to find the third path forward, where, even with greater emotional maturity on the part of both men and women (no externalizing or internalizing), men are seeking wedlock / family / stay-at-home mom's / etc., whereas women are seeking sexual freedom / abortion / homosexuality / one-night stands / etc. How could those differences ever be worked out, without trying to mold others to our liking, without trying to manipulate or control or deceive? (I can imagine someone commenting that women are more malleable... I'm against manipulative, controlling behaviors regardless. Neuro-Linguistic Programming and the like are a scam.)

I'm Christian. And Right-Wing. But I'm not my brother. I don't drink. I haven't been punching holes in walls in fits of rage. I haven't had sex and don't intend to until I get married. I just want to find a wife and start a family.

Where is the path forward, how are Christian, right-wing men to make it through this world, when so many other men also call themselves Christian as they cause destruction and strife and chaos in their wake? Where is the path forward when women have come to hate all that could be good for them- God, men, marriage, family, children, etc.- and love all that will likely be bad for them- abortion, sex out of wedlock, career, LGBT, etc...?

Just a lost soul trying to find his way. Thanks for reading.